Thread by @antiomi

@AGB @kohenari Thanks for the recommendation. I'll try to thread something here. Obviously it will somewhat depend on the age of the kids, but here are some general guidelines /1

@AGB @kohenari * As you have surmised, they're going to hear about it and you are absolutely right they should hear about it from you. If they don't, then when they hear about it they will think they can't talk to you about it./2

@AGB @kohenari * Under no circumstances should you lie. Keep it simple and to known facts, but don't make stuff up. If you do, you are sending the message that you cannot be trusted on this topic. /3

@AGB @kohenari * Similarly, don't leave super important stuff out. Kids know when adults are upset, and what they make up in their heads to fill in the gaps is way worse than the truth. /4

@AGB @kohenari * Kids lack the perspective that adults have about the relative frequency and likelihood of situations such as this. Even though we are feeling like it's not that unlikely at all, to a kid it can feel like it WILL happen every day. We can help with that. /5

@AGB @kohenari * So, what do you say? Here is a sample script: /6

@AGB @kohenari * "Yesterday, in PIttsburgh (explain if that is far away, it's useful), a man went to a synagogue with a gun and shot a lot of people. A lot of people died. The police caught the man and he is in the hospital, and then he will go to jail. . . /7

@AGB @kohenari . . . This is a really scary thing. It scared me and it would make sense if it scared you. I want you to know that I and the people at our synagogue do everything we can to keep you safe. I would not send you there if I thought it was dangerous . . . /8

@AGB @kohenari . . . Things like this are awful but they are very unusual. And even most of the people who were at the synagogue in Pittsburgh are OK. That doesn't mean it's not scary, but it's important to know that this is very unusual. In fact, it's never happened before in our country . /9

@AGB @kohenari . . . I wanted to tell you because I wanted you to know that you can talk to me (and other trusted adults, list them here) if you have any questions or you just are feeling scared or sad about this." /10

@AGB @kohenari * You'll notice that my sample script leaves motive out of it. I think you can safely do that and wait to see if your kid asks. But if they do, you have to be honest: "He really did not like Jewish people because he thought we were bad." /11

@AGB @kohenari * Jewish kids who are past a very young age may make connections to the Holocaust. Reassuring them that that is not what is happening -- that this is a much smaller incident -- is important. /12

@AGB @kohenari If anyone's wondering, I am a clinical social worker with 20 years experience as an educator prior to that. I have specialized training and experience talking to kids about trauma and train schools and community organizations on how to do that. And I'm Jewish. /13 END