Sometimes I'm really aware of how little energy I've had for the last few years.

I always feel like I'll just crumple if I have to do one. extra. thing and there are SO MANY THINGS.
I feel like I've been deficient in energy for so long.

And every so often I'll have a little extra and remember that if everything is dirty you just have to wash a damn knife sometimes and it's suddenly not a big deal at all and I laugh at myself for not being able to something
so easy.

I just gaslight myself immediately. Like, See? You can do it today for the first time in weeks. What was wrong with you before?

But legit. What was wrong with me? What changed in my brain? I wasn't always like this.
I feel like I'm looking at time-distorted versions of myself all the time trying to analyze what the fuck.
I have just so much data about myself to compare over time.
Look, I'm so tired of Existential Crisis Me.
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