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Stand by for important thread on how the Mueller report proves collusion by not finding any collusion because it takes collusion to cover up all the collusion I know was happening. I've asked Twitter to broadcast this to every single user except my therapist. Tweet 1 of 846.
Tweet 49 of 846: "Mueller." Obviously a German name. Which Germany? East Germany probably. A Russian deep cover agent trained by KGB in the 80s, maybe even Putin himself. It was staring us in the face all along.
Tweet 81 of 846: Trump always orders two dishes of ice cream. The orders from Putin must be printed at the bottom of the second dish. A symbolic code whose decryption key is tied to the flavor of the ice cream. Two servings of pistachio = DOOMSDAY.
Tweet 112 of 846: And that's why it's so obvious now that Putin and Trump colluded to cpad9393489ad9393cccclo STUPID CAT I told you to stop walking on the keyboard BAD MR. TINKLEPAWS!
Tweet 202 or 846: I need to insert more between Tweets 114 and 115 to flesh out my theory of how Trump and Putin secretly control Twitter. Consider the next 20 Tweets as 114A through 114T. I may later expand 114G into 114G1 through 114G16. Also please print Tweet 191 and burn it.
Tweet 389 of 846: I hear drums. Drums in the deep. They are coming.
Tweet 533 of 846: I have no memory of writing Tweets 290, 355, and 501 through 512. Whole Foods may have colluded with Trump, Putin, Fox News, and white supremacists to slip a hallucinogenic drug into my kombucha. Ignore those Tweets like I ignored Barr's press conference.
