Thread by @WesElyMD

1/🧵A patient told me he lost hope. A spouse got mad at me for being too direct. I needed #compassion & truth to restructure #hope toward what was possible. These tools can be taught, learned & modeled.

A story for you, placing compassion & hope side-by-side…

2/ Compassion and Hope must be modeled for students to learn…and must be part of every interaction with patients.
 
In my end-of-life conversations, while always remaining kind, I avoid providing false hope.

3/ I was once explaining to a daughter that her mother was dying on the ventilator, a conclusion I had come to over five days as, despite everything we had done, no reprieve was in sight. The once-placid daughter slammed her fist on the table, then raised it at me as I recoiled.

4/ She stormed out, & I finished the conversation w her sister. A surprised med student asked me how I remained poised & hadn’t appeared agitated. I told her I believed the daughter had reached a personal ceiling of grief & was not acting like herself due to the immense stress.

5/ Moments later, when I went into the room to sit with her at her mother’s bedside, we unpacked what had happened. I asked what her mom would want at this stage. She said her mom loved poetry, so we started with Emily Dickinson…

6/fin
#EmilyDickinson: “Hope’ is the thing with feathers - That perches in the soul - And sings the tune without the words – And never stops - at all -.” There was hope even in the face of death. It was a restorative moment for all of us.

By the way, @StephenTrzeciak is a gift to medicine and as author of Compassionomics, put the science and data behind teaching this talent to all health care professionals! TY 🏆