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David Burge @iowahawkblog
, 3 tweets, 1 min read Read on Twitter
I am the very model of a modern Valley billionaire
Private jet to Katmandu in Shangri-La to breathe the air
What is the sound of one hand fapping
Why travel 12,000 miles when you can meditate on the fragrance of your own farts in the comfort of Palo Alto
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All Nerds, Bow Before Your King
keep practicing, and some day hot Spanish girls will pay you to caress their locks with your sweet katana moves and Wolverine claws
Take it from ol' Dave: chicks will start paying attention if you give 'em a little peekaboo unbuttoned shirt action, especially the bottom buttons
Read 3 tweets
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Sonics, "Louie Louie" > original by Richard Berry. Both are classics in their own right, but the Sonics version is definitive and arguably the first headbanger record ever made
Richard Berry's original is a fine mid-tempo R&B shuffle...
...rediscovered by Tacoma WA band Rockin' Robin Roberts & the Wailers a few years later...
Read 4 tweets
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This is why you can't trust Wikipedia. Sure, I'm dead, but obviously my poetry is not "humorously bad"
my ghostly apparition remains floating in this mortal coil only to haunt the critics of my poetry
Someday, my doggerel will be universally proclaimed the finest works of art ever produced by a human being. Until then, I will remain in your timeline, eerily rattling my chains and dropping fart jokes
Read 5 tweets

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