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Narcissism is a refusal of the reality which doesn't fit the self

Believing the self is more important than reality

Narcissism manifests as the belief that one's problems are unique: what worked for others won't work for him

Stagnation, frustration & resentment follow

Narcissism is the stubborn refusal to break the self into a multitude of mental patterns, identifying the ones that are unfit for the reality one lives in & adapting them. Example 👇.

Narcissism is the belief that one's self is one & unadaptable.

This does not mean that one has to bend himself to current reality. One can, and probably should, adapt himself to the self that is best suited to build the reality he desires. The key is to adapt to *reality*, even if future, not to an idealized fiction.

Behaviors which are inherently narcissistic:
- Complaining (i.e. asking the world to comply to your idealized version)
- Refusing to solve problems
- Looking for shortcuts

All of these are narcissistic because they profess a wishful superiority of the ego over reality

No one ever changed his reality by refusing feedback from it.

A subtle difference:
- Considering reality immutable & resigning: bad.
- Acknowledging feedback from reality & learning its rules to change its contents: good.

Narcissism is the main obstacle to the latter.

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