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Be really, really wary of people who respond, if you inform them that something they've said or done has hurt you, with things like, "I know, I'm a shitty person." That's a massive responsibility dodge.
While it may sound like it's acknowledging that they did something shitty and that they realize it was shitty and that they're taking responsibility for it, it's really more of a way to avoid having to DO anything about it.
If the world is just populated with PEOPLE--not non-shitty people who don't screw up and shitty people who can't change--everyone has a responsibility to try to do better if they screw up. And there's no excuse for not at least trying.
Whereas if, instead of being a person who did something shitty, you're just a shitty person, well, you can't really change, can you? Either people accept you exactly as you are and forgive and forget whenever you do something shitty, or they cut off contact.
So, by saying, "I'm just a shitty person" whenever someone points out you hurt them, you're essentially issuing an ultimatum: that's who I am, I'm not changing, so either shut up about it or go away.
So yeah, performative self-flagellation of the "You're right, I'm just a shitty person" type is a giant red flag about someone.
See also: "Well, I guess I just won't say anything at all, then," when you ask someone to not make a certain type of joke, use a particular word, etc.
