Thread by @IfTonyTweeted

I guess we’re doing this.

First up is Fearless, a song I’ve heard. The only lyric I knew going in was “head first, fearless.” It’s more country sounding than I’m generally comfortable with in my music. But she sounds so damn optimistic about things it’s hard not to like her.

Next up 15. Which seems to be about…being a 15 year old girl. Just gonna take her word that this is how it was.

Poor Abigail.

Love Story now. I don’t have a good feeling for this ends, because she’s calling them Romeo and Juliet, mainly.

Maybe Taylor has never actually read Romeo and Juliet.

Wait why are people throwing rocks at Stephen’s window? I fell like we need exposition here

“Hey Stephen” was actually written about a short relationship she had with Stephen Hawking

no no no that’s a lie

Those two have so little in common.

We’re on to White Horse. And things have take a turn for the sad. That optimistic girl from the first song is now lamenting the cruel lot in life she was given.

I prefer “O Fortuna” from Carl Orff’s Carmina Burana when I want to lament the fickle finger of fate, but this is nice too.

We’re on to You Belong With Me and I’ve heard this one before too. Much more assertive, this is a young lady taking charge.

I feel like that note she hits when she sings the line “You belong with me” is what the Sirens used to draw ancient sailors to the rocks. It’s mesmerizing.

On to Breathe.

So let’s talk about the Legent. Dinking it neat, let it mellow in the glass for a few minutes. Not harsh at all, especially for a 94 proof. Good balance of flavors.

Pausing for a few for an important phone call.

Back with Tell Me Why.

I gotta say, she has not had good luck with relationships so far.

I don’t much about her. What I’ve come to believe, from her fans, is she’s a pixie who sprang from a perfect field of daisies to spread joy and share her tales of heartbreak. And so far that image is holding up.

We're on to You’re Not Sorry. Is she singing about the same guy as the last song? Are there multiple jerks or one mega-jerk? Perhaps he’s made up of smaller jerks, a Jerktron of sorts.

We’re on to Thats the Way I loved You. And I think she misses the jerk from the last song because this guy is…nice? This is quite the rollercoaster ride, Ms. Swift.

Forever and Always. I don’t know if she’s singing about the guy from the last song or the song before now. She really should use more names or at least fake names just so we can follow along.

The Best Day is basically Taylor going “What if I sang a song that is basically a series of Kleenex commercials?"

I’m gonna pretend “Change” is about redemption after losing a big basketball game and enjoy it immensely because of that.

I mean, come on:

Tonight we stand, get off our knees
Fight for what we've worked for all these years
And the battle was long, it's the fight of our lives
But we'll stand up champions tonight

And that’s it! She finished with an ode to the Hoos! And if I’m doing my math right, I only lost a handful of followers. Worth it.

I will definitely be enjoying the bourbon again.

But I can’t say I will listen to the album again on purpose. But I can see why people enjoy it. It’s just…not my thing.

I may listen to another TSwift album though. We’ll just have to see how we do in the postseason next year.