Thread by @ManlnTheHoody

do i want the criminals that are openly committing crimes in our white house arrested and put in prison? most of the times, yes. but then i think about how there really aren't any good paul manafort jokes on twitter anymore which makes me deeply sad.😭😭😭

yeaaah..... so this gonna be a sober tweets thread then.... cause i still need my space to tweet to myself and make sure as few people out there see how incoherent my thoughts are....basically a drunk thread with much less chance of tweeting pictures of whatever im drinking

the reason republicans keep trying to cancel everything obama did is because they are trying to cancel his legacy - the hope he gave us. they are trying to cancel our hope.

im super fun at parties

im more than just a guy with a pretty face, an amazing body, and a devil dick. im also fiscally sound. for example, my credit limit is however much money i put on a prepaid debit card to make it look like i have a credit card.

im really an introvert, but when i drink i lose all my inhibitions and retweet myself

just got off the phone with a friend of a friend who asked me how much $ to mulch her roses. drunkish me woulda done it for free...soberish me told her i wont know till im done. never gonna mulch my way to the top if i dont charge for mulching. anyways, gonna go get dirty

that sounds like a euphism to some of yall???.... u know how the famous ghandi saying goes....one may often see themselves in someone elses tweets.....anyways for those of u dont have minds in the gutter, mulching is awesome! yay! civility! yay!

quick someone tag in the fbi on twitter about lewandowski committing crimes because if u dont tag them they wont know

aight, gonna go lay down some mulch in some rose bushes...cheers yall.

got that first layer laid down. got a good spread and made sure everything got covered. she gotta go get dinner and drinks with some people or something so im back at my place taking a break, she want me to come back after dinner to finish up. gotta figure out how much to charge.

so she picks me up in an uber on the way to her house from out with her friends. were in the uber and she says wants me to come every 2 weeks till jan and make sure the mulch is good. add more mulch whenever its low. then she asks what id charge for all that plus today.....

faded af so i cant do math and then she say if its ok shed rather buy me stuff than pay me money. fine. so we uber to best buy. she lets me pick out stuff, then we uber to her place and i finish the 2nd layer of mulch. not drinking me is a better business person than drinking me

im way too high. that shit was like impossible to get out of the box cause i was scared to break it. 😭😭😭 shit is packaged crazy. took me like 10 minutes to find the power cord. think imma wait till tomorrow to plug it in so i dont set it to chiinese or something on accident

so tom arnold was yelling that he saw jerry falwell's dick and ben shapiro wants to see kavanaughs dick....was that both last week? or was one this week? whos dick u think is gonna be news next week. lord help us if its wilbur ross or stephen miller.

hey @TomArnold, whos dick are we gonna wind up having to talk about next. i feel like theres zero chance u dont know.

@TomArnold i did not realize exactly how big this computer i got is. i think i need a new desk. maybe a new place to live. thing is ridiculous. anyways rolling a blunt and celebrating making stupid choices.

@TomArnold lol tom arnold, im high and i forgot i cant untag people so u should mute this thread. altho, i think somehow ur actually crazier than anything here.

@HoarseWisperer, tom just replaced u as my guy stuck on never ending thread lol

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer think about how many women out there have accidentally swiped right on someone like stephen miller and got stuck in that relationship forever because theyre afraid of getting murdered

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer trump promised kim jong un he would buy greenland for him as an anniversary present

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer was gonna apply for a job as a brands social media person but itd be weird for everyone if netflix started tweeting about how big its dick was

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer the whistle blower testimony about trump promising something to a foreign leader needs to be made public so we can all point and laugh at the foreign leader who thought a promise from trump means something lmfao what an idiot 😂😂😂😭😭😭

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer i feel like it aint likely that trump is making promises to putin or mbs on the phone but it is likely on a routine call with, say ukraine, he loses his shit over something, then promises to block all support of ukraine and let russia have their way if they dont help frame biden

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer funny that some of the weirdest news around the same time as this whistleblower shit is happening hiuliani is in the news about some weird trip to ukraine to get dirt on biden

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer dm me if u want join my private twitter where i make up intelligence sources and expertise and expose the truth. i even have a bio with words like rumint and sigint. its super legit. $10/mo or if u want my premium snap where i do different stuff like suck my own dick. $11.75/mo.

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer rod rosenstein told all of us to not trust anonymous sources in the news...and based on newly released emails turns out rod rosenstein offered to be an anonymous source for the news...i dunno what to make of this but i assume cnn will have him on as an anonymous source tonight.

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer cnn did the only thing u shouldnt do when ur trying to fight misinformation. they let rudy giuliani tell lies about the leading democratic primary candidate on national television. what we watched was the first steps in the creation of the next seth rich type conspiracy theory.

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer i got tom and hoarse stuck tagged and wanna tag someone else in that would make this funny af to me. been sitting oding on mariujana thinking for hours, narrowing it down, and im down to the final 3. i cant decide so figure id crowd source it.

WHO SHOULD I ADD? <dramatic music>

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer lol. on second thought fuuuuck that. that sounds fucking terrible. dont vote in the poll. im not gonna do it. i dont think it woulda even worked anyway, i didnt pick good people to add in with hoarse and tom. unrelated: u know how hard it is to find people that dont block hoarse?

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer i was happy for a second there and then i realized that even tho i didnt @ him i typed out "michael avenatti" and that dude name searches himself like crazy so hes gonna show up here anyway.

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer would never block molly jong un. she writes the best letters. such beautiful letters. amazing letters. jong un disowns her as an un and also sees her as a threat, but molly pushes through and still writes the best letters.

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer what trump and giuliani did isnt a biden attack. its an attack on every democrat running. has warren met with ukranians? has harris? has sanders? has booker? did they help with the hunter biden thing? what else did they talk about? are they colluding on this election?

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer thats not thought out at all or anything, im just sativa high and that came into my brain so i figured id tweet it out before i forgot it, because honestly.....i dunno.

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer sobrietyish update:

no drinks for a wk, have been smoking blunts tho. feeling better, body recovering so thats 😍. havent really changed mentally except my imagination is creating eloborate sinister plots and i dont talk about my dick being 11.75" nearly as much. basically never

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer just sitting here thinking bout what kinda records biden played his kid that made it so that he became the center of trumps attack on the 2020 election

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer hard to argue that our democracy isnt dead when ur hoping that mitt romney convinces house democrats to start impeachment

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer if u made a list in 2016 of all the things u thought trump wouldnt get away with trying to do as president and crossed things off after he got away with doing them, the only thing left to cross off would be ingoring the 2020 election and declaring himself president forever.

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer theres nothing that trump could do that republicans wouldnt try to normalize...tomorrow morning a video could come out of trump literally eating fistfuls of shit and by tomorrow night hannity, tucker, and ingraham would have someone shitting directly into their mouths on live tv

@TomArnold @HoarseWisperer i dont get it, trump doesnt actually need ukraines help to do this biden story. he had half the country asking to see obamas long form birth certificate. i kinda feel like he asked for something else, something that benefitted him personally tbh....and also...rum and coke is nice