Thread by @Delafina777

Fuck. Forgiveness. Culture.

https://twitter.com/CTmagazine/status/1216734361745272833

Fuck forgiveness culture, fuck "Christian approaches to counseling", burn it ALL down.

christianitytoday.com/ct/2019/decemb…

You do not need to reconcile with your abuser.
You do not need to forgive your abuser.
You do not need to put together a list of ways you have been "blessed" by your abuser.
You do not need to keep abuse secret so others will feel "safe" around you.

christianitytoday.com/ct/2019/decemb…

You do not need to agree never to speak of abuse again.
You do not owe anyone forgiveness because they've "repented."
You do not need to forgive and then assume the best of an abuser.
It is not "sinful" to say others are in danger from your abuser.

christianitytoday.com/ct/2019/decemb…

The amount of harm the Christian conception of forgiveness has done to our society is incalculable.

Because look, but when your counseling actually makes trauma worse, that actually affects people around them, too. christianitytoday.com/ct/2019/decemb…

And even for people who aren't Christian, aren't in "Christian counseling", etc. it's still setting the norms for forgiveness/reconciliation/etc. in the society we all have to live in, and those norms are DEEPLY FUCKED UP.

christianitytoday.com/ct/2019/decemb…

CW for I dunno, EVERYTHING (sexual abuse, religious abuse, gaslighting, emotional abuse)

*infinite scream*

of course not because original sin and you're a woman and all that bullshit

well isn't THAT fucking convenient for everyone involved except the victim

you know what? if a parent sexually abuses you, you get to be bitter for as long as you damn well feel like it

in a reasonable society, a parent who's sexually abused one child would

never
be
allowed
to
be
alone
with
children
again

but heaven forbid we should ever prioritize the safety of children over men's egos

ahahaha fuck the entire fucking INDUSTRY

it should not be a priority

if the victim comes to want to reconcile, on their OWN, that's one thing

but it should never be a priority for anyone to convince someone to reconcile with their rapist

there, saved you all that money on your apparently useless degrees

Oh, this guy. Yeah, let's talk about this fucking guy.

That "anti-Christian psychobabble" basically means "that Jewish science."

Scratch any weird American hangup about something and you'll generally find sexism, racism, anti-semitism or some combo of those under the paint.

Americans got hangups abt psychotherapy because it was perceived as A) feminine (patients), and B) Jewish (practitioners). That's a whole thread on its own, but early psychoanalysts & patients were almost exclusively Jewish, & even many developers of CBT. forward.com/news/103139/ps…

Toxic root, toxic fruit.

I just...

sure, dudes, sure.

So at least some people in the world of Christian counseling are trying to have a less absurd relationship with standard, tested counseling techniques, but note the weird purity fetish in the "build something on a Christian foundation" approach.

It'd be interesting to parse why even the integrationists feel that there's no combination of existing modalities that allows for "the nuance it lacks on religion and theology."

Since, um, what?

I mean, it's not impossible to see how you get here, logically, when you believe ANY "sin" makes you worthy of eternal damnation, and the solution to all of them is the same (basically, pray for forgiveness).

ok, this at least sounds like a reasonable adult talking...

...welp, nevermind.

ok, this sounds reasonable...

...nevermind.

You fucking THINK?

in what world does it make sense that an abuse victim and their abuser should have THE SAME COUNSELLOR?

People who have graduated from this seminary shouldn't be allowed anywhere NEAR abuse victims, let alone be seen as qualified to counsel them.

oh look, at last, an actual adult

Nah, this IS wrong and bad.

what

Welp, enough of that. It's going to take a bit for me to stop internally screaming.