Thread by @andrewjtagg

I recently gave the commencement address @RCHMelbourne.

Here is it is if you missed it...

"My name is Andrew Tagg. I'm 47 years old and I'm a failure"

And I'm okay with that.

I have failed at high school and in medical school. I have failed as a junior doctor and as a consultant. I have failed academically and professionally.

And that is okay.

And that is what I am going to talk about this evening

TW: mental health

You might think it is an easy road from there to here when you look at your consultants.

That they just stepped on the path and there it was.

It's not - many of us have taken a meandering path - some have taken shortcuts and some have got lost along the way

So it's storytime (as that is what I do) and in order to channel my inner Joseph Campbell, let's meet our hero...

He was the first in his family to go to university and always wanted to be a doctor.

A very special kind of doctor...

He wanted to be a pathologist. The kind that solved mysteries and caught criminals.

It took less than a week at CXWMS to realize that it is NOT what pathologists spend most of their days doing.

(As an aside, I saw my first autopsy at 15 and could still smell it days later - it smelled of porridge)

But then something caught his eye, one Wednesday evening, whilst waiting to start his first ED shift as a student

(I even went to Chicago for my elective. It was so cold my hair froze solid on the walk to the hospital)

I was John Carter and he was me. Both wide-eyed third-year students starting out in the ER

By the time the end credits had rolled, he was hooked...

bit.ly/38J3pLt

Things changed when he started work - we were truly residents. Living on-site, staying late and starting early

Then came a failed relationship, a failed membership exam coupled with daily microaggressions

Work started becoming his life and he became more and more socially isolated

The constant refrain of "Suck it up, you'll cope" and the "we dealt with it so should you" plus those other triggers was enough.

He became lost

There was no way out except for one... (at least that is what I thought at the time)

Was I lacking that mythical resilience we all hear about?

Resilience is mental and physical toughness but we are NOT navy SEALS.

We get up if we make a mistake but...

You can't get up if someone has a boot on your shoulder pushing you down whilst shouting at you to "suck it up"

We need something else - a resistance, strengthened by the kindness of others - out friends, our colleagues, our bosses.

So I got back on track, with help - a hospital stay, high-grade pharmaceuticals, intensive therapy, and friends...

I started showing #grit - determination - stick-to-it-ness.

#grit is getting up to study on your day off, finishing that audit, writing that paper because it takes you one step nearer your goal

But it takes more than the resistance borne of kindness and grit to take you from there to here

It takes failure...

We all fail...

It's what we do afterward that counts...

You could take the way of growth and learn.

Use the failure to drive you forward

Once I was asked to give a talk for an
@RCHMelbourne
update session.

I read, revised and rehearsed and I thought my talk was pretty great

There were 15 people in my session - perhaps it was the adolescent session they were competing against - which had 100+ but who knows?

Instead of throwing the talk in that folder on my laptop labeled "never give this talk again" I chose that third way - the way of growth

After chatting with some friends we turned it into a paper and submitted it to the
@bmj_latest
- no dice

We tried the
@theMJA
and they swiftly said no too - then a third and a fourth rejection until some kindly editor took pity.

It was published a couple of years ago in a journal with an impact factor of 1.5. It has been cited TWICE...

BUT

It's not always about the citations...

bit.ly/2RAecSA

So as you start the next stage of your careers I have an ask of you all.

Show resistance, born of the kindness of others.

Show grit and determination

And fail - often - and grow

You are not lost.

You are here.

End