Thread by @Liv1204

A year ago today I made a decision. I left my house around 9pm, after researching to work out the 'least inconvenient' time.

I stood at the end of a platform and watched the lights approach, and I felt calm.

I was one step away. I felt the movement. The horn sounded.

The driver stopped his train at the station. He got out. Despite my fears of delaying people, he stayed and he talked to me. He got a passenger to call the police. He told me he used to be a fireman, the impact incidents have.

I wish I knew his details, to thank him so much.

A year ago @BTPSussex detained me on a s.136. And the words and care of those officers will stay with me forever.

The wait for the ambulance, the journey to hospital, the time they were in the 136 suite, they talked, they listened, and they cared.

They built up a rapport with me, giving me trust when they could see I was trying.

They distracted me with my tangle toy. Asked questions. Talked about self-harm in the most understanding way I have heard. Told me to 'Focus on my voice'.

A year ago today, an officer told he 'I'm really proud of you'. To know that they could see I was really trying means more than I can explain at that time.

They gave me hope to keep holding on, to walk into the 136 suite with them without trying to run, and to be honest.

This week that same officer who told me he was proud of me, said this:

"If it's OK with you I am going to contact [force] L&D & the Inspector who is force lead for mental health and suggest we try and get you in to some of our training sessions so we too can learn from you."

To have that opportunity to go in and share with officers both what can help (or not help!) to say or do in crisis situations, and also to share with officers the long-term impact you can have, is incredible.

Your words and actions will stay with a person forever. Thank you. 💙

Oh, and...a final shout-out to the 2nd officer in ambulance, who I believe was pretty new to the job(?), felt pretty travel sick facing sideways in the ambulance, & kept saying sorry to his colleague. 😀

Seriously, I remember your words and care and I am so grateful. Thank you.

A massive thank you also to the paramedics who took us to the 136 suite (and to every other paramedic who has helped or cared in MH crises).

Ambulances can be incredibly frightening. I find them very distressing, following my mum's death. You and the officers helped walk in.

And to the paramedic who made me laugh by remembering a past time: 'I was talking to you & you took the cuffs off & just casually scratched your nose with a free hand, h the police were like, 'How?' It was really funny!'

Humour & laughter truly can be so powerful. 💙🚑