Lowering your standards for the person you're dating is a slippery slope.
At first you'll think you made the proper sacrifice for the relationship.
But with time?
Resentment builds.
Don't lower your standards.
Inspire them to up theirs.
At first you'll think you made the proper sacrifice for the relationship.
But with time?
Resentment builds.
Don't lower your standards.
Inspire them to up theirs.
'Okay, but how do I know when to inspire them or when to dump them?'
Good question.
And I have the answer.
It all begins with a 2 step checklist....👇
Good question.
And I have the answer.
It all begins with a 2 step checklist....👇
Checklist:
1. Awareness
2. Changed behavior
1. Awareness
2. Changed behavior
This is the checklist you want to follow.
If they don't display the 2 traits from the checklist, then guess what.
'What?'
They're holding you back.
'Gotcha! Can you explain this checklist?'
Sure.
If they don't display the 2 traits from the checklist, then guess what.
'What?'
They're holding you back.
'Gotcha! Can you explain this checklist?'
Sure.
1. Awareness
You can try to inspire them all you want, but if they have poor awareness skills then you're wasting your time.
'Why? Won't a lecture work?'
Nah.
Humans need to be aware that there is something to fix before they fix it.
You can try to inspire them all you want, but if they have poor awareness skills then you're wasting your time.
'Why? Won't a lecture work?'
Nah.
Humans need to be aware that there is something to fix before they fix it.
If they have poor awareness, they are going to be annoyed by you when you try to correct them.
They'll confuse your inspiration as nagging.
So first, make sure they know for themselves that something is wrong.
You can guide them with strategic questions.
They'll confuse your inspiration as nagging.
So first, make sure they know for themselves that something is wrong.
You can guide them with strategic questions.
2. Changed behavior
Many people are aware & know they have to change, but they don't do shit about it!
They go back to watching Netflix & gorging their fatass with Twinkies.
Which is why monitoring the changed behavior is crucial.
Many people are aware & know they have to change, but they don't do shit about it!
They go back to watching Netflix & gorging their fatass with Twinkies.
Which is why monitoring the changed behavior is crucial.
For this step, you shouldn't be coddling them.
They should have the maturity to lead themselves & take care of business.
If they can't do that, then it's just another red flag you have to worry about.
They should have the maturity to lead themselves & take care of business.
If they can't do that, then it's just another red flag you have to worry about.
'Ah gotcha! I'll bring it up to the person I'm dating today. They have been holding me back.'
Good.
An ambitious person dating a lazy person normally ends poorly.
So try out my 2 step strategy & see how it plays out.
Good.
An ambitious person dating a lazy person normally ends poorly.
So try out my 2 step strategy & see how it plays out.
'And if it doesn't work?'
Then dump em.
'Really??'
Ya. If you're as ambitious as you say you are, then this problem will continue to get worse.
Either break up now or in the future.
With one option you save time.
With the other you waste time.
No brainer.
Then dump em.
'Really??'
Ya. If you're as ambitious as you say you are, then this problem will continue to get worse.
Either break up now or in the future.
With one option you save time.
With the other you waste time.
No brainer.
'Sounds good! My standards are high. Let me see if I can get my partner to raise theirs as well!'
Perfect.
Goodluck.
For more emotional intelligence tips & tactics, follow @ArmaniTalks
Perfect.
Goodluck.
For more emotional intelligence tips & tactics, follow @ArmaniTalks
