Thread by @havi

VITAL UPDATE: my road runner porch-buddy used to run away if I wanted a pic but now when he catches a lizard he KNOCKS ON MY DOOR and then parades his catch around and poses, it’s amazing. Who’s a good boy! Mr Meepmeep! 😍

UPDATE ON THE UPDATE: my friend the wildlife biologist who goes to actual bird conventions thinks this is courting behavior, he was like “sorry even the birds find you irresistible”, so will update, saw him shyly hopping around this morning but no pics

I mean, my roadrunner porch buddy was shyly hopping around, not the wildlife biologist, not sure what he’s up to, possibly similar but not on my porch

Mr Meepmeep knocking on my door with his prize

My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard

He was just on my porch again and there’s an oven outside (in the middle of a stressful unplanned kitchen reno here), and he did an elaborate dance while looking at his reflection, and I am devastated that I did not get video.

So shy though

Today’s catch

He’s now taken to jumping in the air and flinging himself at my window until it rattles and I come downstairs, then he does a dance

Would that someone in my own species be this invested in making a good impression on me but nope 🤷🏼‍♀️🤷🏼‍♀️🤷🏼‍♀️🤷🏼‍♀️🤷🏼‍♀️🤷🏼‍♀️🤷🏼‍♀️

I swear to god I don’t even know where I’d find a straight guy who’d even trim his nose hair for a date never mind actually do something nice for me so team road runner all the way

His most chill and mundane version of the “I brought you a present” dance

Possibly he feels awkward about how it was only a cricket tonight instead of a giant fucking lizard idk

Wow one tweet about how it’d be cool to meet a boy who puts in some minimal effort and also brings you (non-lizard) gifts, and your DMs fill up with the RANDOIEST RANDOS. Come on. Engage wisely.

Like, if we’ve NEVER interacted before, any DM along the lines of hi I am a man and I exist = very suspicious squinting-through-monocle emoji

Omg omg the wildest thing just happened

I just got home and saw the road runner hanging out near the porch, so I was like oh hey buddy what’s up, and he RAN off into the shrubbery (can you call a mess of cactus and aloe shrubbery?)

So I was like oh okay you don’t wanna hang out when you don’t have something to show me, got it. See you tomorrow probably?

I go inside and start unloading groceries and less than a minute later there’s a knock at the window, and there he is with a lizard in his mouth. He went and RETRIEVED A LIZARD to show me (!!!!!)

And then he went and brought another one

I mean

#2

His face omg

For some reason all the animals love visiting the side door. This brave bunny!

Once happened upon a BOBCAT napping there in the corner (gave me a startle but like, a MAGICAL startle of FRISSON) and I can’t find my pics but I posted one on the blog

fluentself.com/blog/personal/…

The Wild Wild Nest

THANKS to everyone who loves Mr Meepmeep! If you want to direct love somewhere good, People Helping People in Arivaca AZ works to protect refugees at the border and document scary and illegal shit that border patrol does here. ❤️

phparivaca.org/?page_id=88

Roadrunners are good souls and would totally throw milkshakes AND punch nazis if they could, I checked this with two wildlife biologists.

And everyone is totally adorable to suggest marriage but I am just not the marrying type so I will keep being the witch of the garden and he will keep showing off his lizard collection / dance moves

Haven’t seen Mr Meepmeep this morning but on the theme of Put A Bird On It, here is a very tiny schmoo (sorry I’m not a birdwatcher, what is anything called) on my flowering agave that is about to give birth to a thousand baby agaves.

Sadly I did not get worthy pics of the majestic bobcat who’s been traipsing back and forth in front of the window for the past couple days while I do sun salutations (and then Very Casually takes off as soon as I finish and find my phone), but it made me think about things...

Animals ALWAYS KNOW you’re there. They catch on the second you’re watching them. We’re absolutely massive in their eyes and potentially predatory, and they’re paying attention.

Good lord, we get bunnies here by the clown car, and the moment I even glance out the window, they launch into the most uproarious impersonation of a statue.

Bunnies are the funniest most terrible mimes. Though once a bunny did actully hold still for so long I genuinely thought it might have had a heart attack and died standing up! It waited for me to walk away and then was like oh thank god.

All that to say, they know when you’re at the window, they know if you’re watching, and they’ve been checking *you* out, gauging to what extent you are trustworthy.

I’m positive Mr Meepmeep LOVES his own reflection, and I also do not think he thinks he is a female meepmeep, they have different coloring, he knows exactly what male and female road runners look like.

I don’t think he’s fighting with “another” male bird either, because making an offering of a fun snack like a lizard is exactly what male road runners do when they want to get a girl (road runner, obviously) to like them and say yes to nesting.

And I don’t think he wants ME to nest with him, I think he just doesn’t have a better way of demonstrating affection, and also he wants someone, anyone, to be impressed by these GIANT-ASS lagartijas (which I am, I applaud every time)

I’ve talked to a few people who have spent years in these more remote parts, and they say that if a bobcat or road runner gets in proximity to you, then they’ve decided you’re safe, which tbh is an even bigger compliment than a lizard delivery.

Anyway, I am smitten by all the charming AF bird love stories and tales of friendship in this thread, may we all have loving and mutually chill relationships with wild life (the Well Actuallys too, bless) 😘

This bobcat, for example, absolutely knows that I’m a foot away and watching from indoors, and plays it super cool like nbd just streeeetching, stretching my way off the deck

(oh sorry I either misread or read in the wrong place, because this site says they do have the same feather stripey bits, still I am sure he knows just by behavior who he is looking at)

sciencing.com/there-between-…

To be clear: all conceivable genders of birds/humans welcome to fall madly (also respectfully) in love with me and I would probably reciprocate (who doesn’t love tasty snacks) had I not gone on *so* many disastrous dates, so still in hermit mode thanks

(please don’t bring me any more lizards)

(Okay this is actually really good example of what not to do to impress a chick, sorry sorry sorry, via @dancinghorse)

@dancinghorse I sent a pic of Mr Meepmeep to my uncle Svevo who lives in the woods and showers outdoors and is my actual favorite person in the world, and he just texted me YOUR GENTLE SPIRIT ENGENDERS TRUST FROM WILD CREATURES so now I’m going to cry

I didn’t know he knew how to do ALL CAPS