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Slava Malamud
@SlavaMalamud
, 3 tweets, 1 min read Read on Twitter
Go back where you came from. Always. Every time. This is always what they retort to. This is the one thing they have over you: they crawled out of their moms' vaginas on American territory. So, they have the right to talk about this country. And you don't.
Fuckers. Useless cunts.
And it doesn't even matter where exactly you were born. It's about whether you look and sound a certain way. You can be born in NYC and be named Ocasio-Cortez, or in Detroit and be named Rashida. Or in Hawaii and be named Barack. So, you are not "American", not real, go back...
But noooo, he is not racist. The left has lost its marbles. Look at black unemployment figures. It's the Dems who run the plantation. Blah blah blah.
I can't even anymore. For those of us who have heard this for decades, this is like a nightmare coming alive.
Fuck this shit.
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Slava Malamud
@SlavaMalamud
At a baseballing match. On the scale of 0 to 10, with 0 = "everybody to get frrrom street" and 10 = "quadruple-size this, please" , how American do I look?
(3.6="not great, not terrible", of course)
I'm certain there are words in the English language to express just how outrageously repugnant the Orioles are, but none of them were on my citizenship test.
If the entire Orioles roster doesn't get sent down to Norfolk by the middle of the 5th, we'll call it a moral victory.
Read 5 tweets
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Slava Malamud
@SlavaMalamud
OK, then, I will go ahead and review the rest of #StrangerThings, the season that dedicated itself to two noble goals: exploring the worlds of one-handed suspended strangulation and Soviet stereotypes. Also, apparently, it's very heavy on long-distance relationships. Bummer, Mike
Here is my review of the glorious Soviet stranglings in Episode 1:

And here is my explanation of Russian linguistics in American ice cream parlors in Episode 2:

Let's move on, then, with the final few episodes. Poor Alexei 😭
Let me first pay tribute to the Glorious Comrade Baumann, easily the least annoying character in season 3. The working masses of the world express the greatest hope that capitalist pig Hopper stays dead and the Marx-bearded Murray takes over as the male lead. Now, his Russian...
Read 33 tweets
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Slava Malamud
@SlavaMalamud
All right, I have now seen Episode 2 of Strangler Things... er, I mean #StrangerThings and I am profoundly happy. Mostly because the show's creators have clearly understood that one-handed strangulation does not have to be an exclusive domain of the Soviet Heavy.
I really hope more American filmmakers recognize this. Of course, Bacho slowly grabbing Pavel by the neck and pensively uttering "I told you to not make them suffer" as we see Pavel's feet dangling half a meter off the ground would have been a kickass Chernobyl scene. But...
... as the wispy-armed American idiot above clearly demonstrates, the art of one-handed suspended strangulation can be mastered by any heavy of any nationality. Of course, the American Idiot couldn't do it properly, but I didn't say everyone can be Glorious World Champion, did I?
Read 30 tweets

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-Rowing builds your back muscles MORE than ANY other movement. Lats, rhomboids, traps, all of them. They need rows to grow

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One thing KOT have been SUPERSTARS about calling out this week is "gaslighting" which is when people try to distract you from the real issues of the fight. For everyone who is unclear about what this is, let me do a quick primer using the Kimiko/NYT situation to illustrate.
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