Thread by @tenhet_leigh

As a generous act to my beloved partner I am live tweeting The Song Remains The Same at 8:30 PM central standard time on March 28, 2020. #LedZeppelin #thesongremainsthesame

Gangsters and Nazis? And I’m told no active band members are featured in any of these scenes #thesongremainsthesame

A werewolf that splatters cocaine when he shot by a Tommy gun? Rainbow arterial bleed from a decapitated head? #thesongremainsthesame

And here comes everyone’s astrological esoteric symbolism in the opening credits although Robert Plant’s looks like a corndog with a dab of mustard on the tip of it #thesongremainsthesame

When doves cry dazed & confused #thesongremainsthesame

They’re not the same naked tweens that appeared on an album cover later these are just the genitals of Robert Plant’s children? #thesongremainsthesame

Some storytime for MOUTHBREATHERS and then we are off to a little psychedelic sinister foreshadowing, maybe? #thesongremainsthesame

So freaky red eyes, aeroplanes and limousines AND a space time fold from rewR-all England to NYC? Is Robert Plant controlling the Spice/Melange #Dune #MuahDib #thesongremainsthesame

I do greatly appreciate the effort to bring #sparkle to the costumes and match some beads and bangles with the commando genitalia in lo-rise jeans #thesongremainsthesame

Drinking game for sightings of the pageboy haircut worn so fetchingly by Mr Jones #LedZeppelin #thesongremainsthesame

For a non Zeppelin fan, this is a deeper dive into their skills, their youthful personalities and what life was like for them at this high point in their careers. The #blues tone is making me curious how they appropriated a style they weren’t born to #thesongremainsthesame

Just got a sighting of the pageboy haircut and yelled out the name of a lord and savior. He has some dangly balls to complement the swishy locks...dangly off his shirt...blouse? #thesongremainsthesame

WHAT IS THE PATCH or DESIGN TO THE RIGHT OF R PLANT’S PEEN? My best squinty guess is two rabbits making obeisance to an Irish Promise ring heart. That haircut is getting me drunk!

Haircut! Dutch boy! And now Plant is playing with vocal fx as I am warned to expect more fantasy sequence shenanigans. Dark figures at the back of the arena. Haircut - again and now we are at a creepy pipe organ in a smoggy land #thesongremainsthesame

I’m not going to drink while his hair and his blouse go so well together. #thesongremainsthesame

Did the sisters from Heart pop by for cameos? I have to wonder if all the men on horseback sourced their hats from the same era. #thesongremainsthesame

I thought the red horse legs galloping by were in fact socks flapping on the wind. I was totally comfortable with the 1970s style sock feature so commonplace in films made during that era. #flappysock #oeuvre #thesongremainsthesame

Eh, the coca-cola logo emblazoned with the word “Cocaine”! #promotion #1970s #thesongremainsthesame. But the venue manager completely understands the work “kickback” instantly. And the word “cunt”

Roll credits! #thesongremainsthesame. (@cinemasins)

And now I’m on a boat #thesongremainsthesame

Jesus? With a sword? And some R Plant Lamaze....”Push! Push!” Is it British or is it Welsh or is it Viking? Is it ok to leave the fog machine running on your marauding skiff while you pillage? #thesongremainsthesame

Climbing with an unsheathed sword.... on shrooms.

When hawks attack! Uh....so the sword gives you sexy and fighty powers? And wavy, wavy blonde hair. (Jimmy Page is wearing g bedazzled sleeves on stage and it is mesmerizing...like they are battery operated) #thesongremainsthesame

Wait!!! What the fu....the cops just let three random dudes in to the back of the Garden simply because they asked?! No way!!! Where were these permissive cops when I first saw Duran Duran in 1985??? #thesongremainsthesame

Y’all! my sweet, loyal and musically gifted lover just said, “We can shorten this film considerably if we skip Moby Dick.” I have never loved him more. #skipthatdick #thesongremainsthesame

I’ve been told to just listen for a minute and stop tweeting because John Pageboy Jones just put on his Christmas Ornament outfit again #thesongremainsthesame

(sneaking in to ponder the usefulness of a VIOLIN bow on a guitar...LIVE). #thesongremainsthesame

I keep asking every 120 seconds if we are at Moby Dick yet so we can fast forward.... the subtitles announce [high-pitched wailing and screeching] 😳 #thesongremainsthesame. We are in a rocky forest, climbing in a velvet jacket...

Gandalf becomes Obi-wan who becomes Merlin who morphs into a rip off of 2001: A Space Odyssey. Rainbow Tracers!!! Who brought the MDMA? #thesongremainsthesame

Two black cops and then a third black cop take down a white boy sneaking in the back. Different times. #1970s #thesongremainsthesame. Nobody can confirm for me that this is still the song “Dazed and Confused”...

I think I remember MTV showing this film #thesongremainsthesame at some point and me thinking (at13 or14) the fx were what it must be like if you did yes to drugs. #justsayno

Partner: this solo will go on for another 2 minutes plus, so we can go ahead and fast forward it.
Me: 😐 Partner: you kids and your MTV

I’ve been told I can skip the “Stairway to Heaven” masturbatory tom-foolery... but then I hear the dreaded phrase: “oh but wait, the Melatron! You gotta hear that!” #thesongremainsthesame

“Do you hear the Bach that he’s doing with the Melatron?” 😬 #thesongremainsthesame. “There’s a whole mirror image sequence dedicated to Plant’s peen. Brightly lit.” Say what now?

We are in official split-screen! With 42:00 to go.... 😲 wait up! Split-screen stopped....some hot tambtactiin cranking up...SPLIT-SCREEN CROTCH!! #TheSongRemainsTheSame

Who mastered the sound levels for the crowd? It seems, uh, incongruent. AND the split screen did not solve the mystery of the crotch patch. We are now skipping the “Moby Dick” sequence. This is like pitocin during prolonged labor. #TheSongRemainsTheSame

Partner: we are through ”Moby Dick” and we are closing out.
Me: hahahahahaha. Liar.

#TheSongRemainsTheSame (Now there’s a bank robbery?)

Plant’s peen has shifted position from 3 o’ clock to 4 o’ clock. (Glimpses of the folk who hang out on the sidelines of the stage; no one wearing protective hearing gear). #wholelottalove #TheSongRemainsTheSame

Partner: you’re going to be able to get your theremin groove on.
Me: this is like when we tease the dog and make him bark. #TheSongRemainsTheSame

#splitscreen is Jimmy Oage wearing a #bedazzled Saturn patch on his left flank #TheSongRemainsTheSame

#pageboy and now R Plant is doing his big Sam Harris finish...oh, and chant preaching.... #TheSongRemainsTheSame

Drink-o-Vision! And they are playing a sort of speakeasy, big swing band sound. I like this part. Not enough to stay awake much longer, but it’s pleasant to listen to. #TheSongRemainsTheSame

Smoke! Flash bang! They really are crowded together in a very close way for playing such a large venue. And yet the song goes on and on and on and on and on. The finale of the coda.... #TheSongRemainsTheSame

The gigantic patterns on the fabrics they are all wearing. Houndstooth, paisley, bric-a-brac, bedazzling, needlepoint. It’s a tapestry of pageantry. Exhausting. #TheSongRemainsTheSame

The final credits disclaimer that none of the fantasy sequences were shot at Madison Square Garden is so innocent in a way. Truth in advertising. Seems naive and sweet. #TheSongRemainsTheSame

@threadreaderapp please unroll

*tambourine