Or they'd ring you up, twisting your ear through the handset like the General to Dick Dastardly.
I probably deserved it.
They'd probably make her managing editor now.
We did write about that. That was about her. Although in hindsight, it was more about him.
Why? She was in her 90s. Her eyesight was failing.
So I opened my notebook and started scribbling.
Had she lived to know what Twitter was, she probably wouldn't want me writing about it on here either. But she would have been worried sick about Alex Ferguson. So I thought I'd write this anyway.