#ShwastyLiveTweet of #JurassicPark starts NOW
I know this movie is about a dinosaur island, which would been a less appealing name for the movie
I don't know any of the actors in it, or ANYTHING. I'm gonna go out on a limb and say something goes horribly wrong, though
HIT IT
I know this movie is about a dinosaur island, which would been a less appealing name for the movie
I don't know any of the actors in it, or ANYTHING. I'm gonna go out on a limb and say something goes horribly wrong, though
HIT IT
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
These shooty-bois look like the bad guys. I thought dinosaurs were gonna be the bad guys?
These shooty-bois look like the bad guys. I thought dinosaurs were gonna be the bad guys?
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
I don't know what main dude's name is but I'm gonna call him Dan the Dino Man.
I don't know what main dude's name is but I'm gonna call him Dan the Dino Man.
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
Velociraptors used to scare the hell out of me. They're like little sharp angry murder-puppies.
This is the first live tweet I've done with alcohol.
This goan get good
Velociraptors used to scare the hell out of me. They're like little sharp angry murder-puppies.
This is the first live tweet I've done with alcohol.
This goan get good
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
This is some seriously epic and uplifting music. Was this a Williams?
This is some seriously epic and uplifting music. Was this a Williams?
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
Let's go to my private island, but we'll have to take one of my private helicopters to get there, and then we'll take the custom made jeeps. I'll have pilots and chauffeurs for it all.
Dude just admit you're a rich supervillain, Godric.
Let's go to my private island, but we'll have to take one of my private helicopters to get there, and then we'll take the custom made jeeps. I'll have pilots and chauffeurs for it all.
Dude just admit you're a rich supervillain, Godric.
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
My man Dan is about to lose it. Had to take a breather. Too much dinosaur.
One dinosaur is a lot of dinosaur. I, too, am overwhelmed.
My man Dan is about to lose it. Had to take a breather. Too much dinosaur.
One dinosaur is a lot of dinosaur. I, too, am overwhelmed.
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
Dan: It's tropical, gonna wear a brimmed hat
Godric: Gonna wear all white; less heat
Blondie: SHORTEST shorts
Jeff Goldblum: I'll bring an assortment of leathers. Call me dino-daddy.
Dan: It's tropical, gonna wear a brimmed hat
Godric: Gonna wear all white; less heat
Blondie: SHORTEST shorts
Jeff Goldblum: I'll bring an assortment of leathers. Call me dino-daddy.
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
I remember seeing instructional videos like this in school. Oh shit this is real.
I remember seeing instructional videos like this in school. Oh shit this is real.
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
Dude even made a damn rollercoaster to show off science
Take note, STEM fields. You want me to get excited about science? Make it seatbelt-worthy.
Dude even made a damn rollercoaster to show off science
Take note, STEM fields. You want me to get excited about science? Make it seatbelt-worthy.
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
LIFE FINDS A WAY
I did not know that was from this movie. I thought it was like Independence Day or something.
LIFE FINDS A WAY
I did not know that was from this movie. I thought it was like Independence Day or something.
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
"What do you feed the dinosaurs, doc?"
"We just drop a whole ass cow in there lmao burger time"
"What do you feed the dinosaurs, doc?"
"We just drop a whole ass cow in there lmao burger time"
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
If dinosaurs are like ancestors of chickens or something, could you deep fry a T-rex?
Jurassic Fried Rex.
If dinosaurs are like ancestors of chickens or something, could you deep fry a T-rex?
Jurassic Fried Rex.
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
Of course this place has a Michelin star restaurant.
Godric is basically Lex Luthor.
Of course this place has a Michelin star restaurant.
Godric is basically Lex Luthor.
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
And now here comes the voices of reason. Like
WHY'D YOU MAKE AN ISLAND OF MURDEROUS LIZARDS AND POISONOUS FLORA YOU INSANE OLD MAN
And now here comes the voices of reason. Like
WHY'D YOU MAKE AN ISLAND OF MURDEROUS LIZARDS AND POISONOUS FLORA YOU INSANE OLD MAN
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
Dan is NOT good with kids.
I mean, he's a scientist, not a damned babysitter
Dan is NOT good with kids.
I mean, he's a scientist, not a damned babysitter
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
Jeff Goldblum wasn't even given a script. He's just dropping poetry bombs and quotable stuff like it's no big deal.
Jeff Goldblum wasn't even given a script. He's just dropping poetry bombs and quotable stuff like it's no big deal.
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
"So what about the Rex, what do you feed him, doc?"
"Goats lol chain em up"
"This is getting kinda weird"
"Wait til you see the brontosaurus"
"They eat leav-..."
"Big. Ass. Monkeys."
"..."
"I love being rich"
"So what about the Rex, what do you feed him, doc?"
"Goats lol chain em up"
"This is getting kinda weird"
"Wait til you see the brontosaurus"
"They eat leav-..."
"Big. Ass. Monkeys."
"..."
"I love being rich"
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
Hey let's wander into the thick of the park off the tour route
Nothing will go wrong here
Hey let's wander into the thick of the park off the tour route
Nothing will go wrong here
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
All of a sudden the Dynamic Dino Duo are doing a Dino differential diagnosis to determine the disease.
That's a very specialized, and alliterative, field.
All of a sudden the Dynamic Dino Duo are doing a Dino differential diagnosis to determine the disease.
That's a very specialized, and alliterative, field.
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
The most inaccurate part of this movie so far is a bunch of scientific and important software being run on Macintosh computers.
The most inaccurate part of this movie so far is a bunch of scientific and important software being run on Macintosh computers.
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
"Maybe it's the power trying to come back on"
Or maybe it's the biggest damn danosaur you ever seen
"Maybe it's the power trying to come back on"
Or maybe it's the biggest damn danosaur you ever seen
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
And he's on the lose
Biggest damn Dino is just floating around
Not good
And he's on the lose
Biggest damn Dino is just floating around
Not good
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
Rex just roared, and my cat was having NONE OF IT
She's now in the back room under the piano
Rex just roared, and my cat was having NONE OF IT
She's now in the back room under the piano
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
Blondie is now wearing a large raincoat, but be damned if she's givin up them 90's shorts.
Blondie is now wearing a large raincoat, but be damned if she's givin up them 90's shorts.
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
"Well I see no trace of Dan and the kids, but I'll be DAMNED if there ain't just so much blood and torso around where the bathroom used to be."
"Well I see no trace of Dan and the kids, but I'll be DAMNED if there ain't just so much blood and torso around where the bathroom used to be."
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
"Hey listen, the brontosauruses!"
"They're singing!"
Yeah and they're still better than Radiohead.
"Hey listen, the brontosauruses!"
"They're singing!"
Yeah and they're still better than Radiohead.
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
I just got the biggest and most unironic sense of wonder and happiness from them getting to feed a dinosaur.
This is magical as shit.
I just got the biggest and most unironic sense of wonder and happiness from them getting to feed a dinosaur.
This is magical as shit.
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
"The dinosaurs are breeding!"
Life uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh finds a way.
"The dinosaurs are breeding!"
Life uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh finds a way.
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
Jeff Goldblum was like pure sex in the 90's.
No one man should have that much power.
Jeff Goldblum was like pure sex in the 90's.
No one man should have that much power.
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
Id like to revise the part where I said Dan wasn't good with kids.
He is now Dan the Dino AND KID Man.
Id like to revise the part where I said Dan wasn't good with kids.
He is now Dan the Dino AND KID Man.
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
"Here, we're gonna need this"
*loads one single shell into shotgun*
Boy someone sure is optimistic
"Here, we're gonna need this"
*loads one single shell into shotgun*
Boy someone sure is optimistic
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
That's a total shit eating grin Dan just shot the kids after faking electrocution.
Dan is my hero.
That's a total shit eating grin Dan just shot the kids after faking electrocution.
Dan is my hero.
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
Aussie's dead
This doesn't look good for blondie
At least you guys didn't make me watch 5 movies to get emotionally attached before this shit happens.
Aussie's dead
This doesn't look good for blondie
At least you guys didn't make me watch 5 movies to get emotionally attached before this shit happens.
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
OH FUCK ALL OVER ME
THERE IS NO WAY A DAMNED DANOSAUR COULD OPEN DOORS
OH FUCK ALL OVER ME
THERE IS NO WAY A DAMNED DANOSAUR COULD OPEN DOORS
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
That is a VERY unsettling noise they're making
I'm gonna hear that in my nightmares, yeah?
That is a VERY unsettling noise they're making
I'm gonna hear that in my nightmares, yeah?
#ShwastyLiveTweet #JurassicPark
The level of PTSD these people have would be insane. And imagine trying to treat that.
*Closes fridge door*
"AHHHHH"
"Oh my god are you okay?"
"Yeah just thought the dinosaurs were back"
The level of PTSD these people have would be insane. And imagine trying to treat that.
*Closes fridge door*
"AHHHHH"
"Oh my god are you okay?"
"Yeah just thought the dinosaurs were back"
