Thread by @faineg

HERE ARE SOME FUN FACTS, IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER, ABOUT THE PILLBUG/WOODLOUSE/POTATO BUG/ROLY-POLY/DOODLEBUG/WOW, WHO KNEW THESE THINGS HAD SO MANY NAMES, WHAT'S UP WITH THAT, ANY BUG-SPECIALIST LINGUISTS IN THE HOUSE

anyway:

The pillbug that lives in our gardens is in the amusingly-named Armadillidiidae family: they're isopods, or terrestrial crustaceans. This means they are definitely related to lobsters. One wonders how they might taste if they were really big..

BUT WAIT: there is such a thing as a giant isopod: it looks pretty much exactly like the small rollable isopods that live in your pansies. (They are directly related to one another). They can grow to be almost a foot long, thanks to deep-sea gigantism.

The Yokohama Aquarium in 2014 had a special event where they offered deep-fried isopod. The flavor was "kinda like prawn or crab" and "not bad." Presumably that's how pillbugs would also taste! If you ate like, a thousand of them! Maybe don't do that!

soranews24.com/2014/03/12/din…

Enormous, plush giant isopods were briefly a trend in Japan in 2013 and 2014, but I never got one, because no one loves me. My birthday is tomorrow and I just wanted to throw that out there, that I live bereft of a weird plush giant isopod. Like an animal. amazon.com/Creature-Giant…

BUT BACK TO LAND-DWELLING GIANT ISOPODS. The variety you're likely to see in your North American yard is called Armadillidium vulgare, and they're native to Europe: they have been introduced around the world, presumably by accident, though I know not the dark desires of man.

The common pillbug lives a year and a half on average, but can make it to two. They rely on "a highly social lifestyle for proper longevity," and are much more likely to die if they live alone. We cannot survive in the mulchy, damp underbrush of modern existence without *love*.

According to this very informative source, most of what a common pillbug does at any time revolves around "a constant struggle to preserve body moisture and prevent unnecessary desiccation," which, girl, same.

animaldiversity.org/accounts/Armad…

There are twelve known pillbug species in the northern and central US, and there's more in coastal areas and in Florida, because species diversity always get wack as hell in Florida. (I was born there, which proves it). www3.northern.edu/natsource/INVE…

This fascinating (open access!) book chapter has all kinds of great facts: for example, it's likely pillbugs came to North America in dirt used in ship ballast. This image shows the difference between 2 common introduced North American species. - researchgate.net/publication/30…

In 1984, surprised researchers found over 80% of pillbugs in local populations were female: it turns out the Wolbachia bacterium transforms genetic male pillbugs into functional females - Wolbachia is transmitted maternally, so creating more females helps it reproduce.

The wolbachia bacterium has triggered the evolution of an entirely new *sex chromosome* in infected pillbugs, according to French researchers. Wild. schaechter.asmblog.org/schaechter/201…

Here's some more weird shit! Have you ever seen a violently purple pillbug - and I mean REALLY purple, "possibly hallucinating" purple? You were not imagining it. You saw a pillbug infected with something called an iridovirus, and it is *strange*.

The "iridovirus" forms crystals underneath a pillbug's shell, which causes the striking color change. It does not infect vertebrates, so we are safe.

whatsthatbug.com/2009/07/13/sow…

BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE: This rather exhaustive journal issue on Iridoviridae reports that the earliest reports of blue pillbugs were made in 1843, in France: it is possibly it's more prevalent in California, but no one knows for sure. books.google.com/books?id=vubwC…

I was reading the Iridovirdae journal and stopped absolutely fucking dead on THIS paragraph - which claims that terrestrial isopods (otherwise known as pillbugs) were used in the preparation of sauces in French cuisine.

I HAD TO KNOW MORE.

The naturalist Albert Vandel published a series of volumes called the Faune de France in the mid-20th century: #64 was devoted to pillbugs. Presumably the reference to cooking-with-isopods can be found here. Can someone who reads French please investigate? faunedefrance.org/bibliotheque/d…

NO, by GOD, I'VE FOUND IT. HERE is Vandel's discussion of the role of the humble pillbug in fine French cuisine.

"It seems that their culinary use is also restricted, although Collinge (1943b) noted on a French menu the words "Sole fried, sauce of the woodlice."

Well.

I have figured out where Collinge got the idea of "fried sole with woodlice sauce." It came from a Vincent M. Holt, a proponent in 1898 of the culinary delights of insects. The New England Journal of Medicine wrote about it: the full menu is found here. books.google.com/books?id=TbI1A…

Vincent M Holt's straight-forwardly titled 1885 manifesto titled "Why Not Eat Insects?" may be enjoyed here. HOWEVER: Mr. Holt was firmly against eating lobsters, which he considered "a foul feeder." Well, he had a point, they are also just big-ass bugs. books.google.com/books?id=awNbA…

Man, that Vincent Holt was onto some real Slate-pitch level shit back in 1885. I kind of love him. There are people today who are dedicated to the cause of getting people to eat more bugs: I've eaten quite a few and enjoyed them. Not pillbugs, though. Too cute. Too..crunchy?

Did you know that the act of eating insects as a food source is called "entomophagy"? Is fun word.

Anyway, here's a website called "Eat the Planet" referring to pillbugs as "land shrimp."

Yes, um, sure. Land shrimp. eattheplanet.org/land-shrimp-a-…

A blogger describes here what it tastes like when you find some woodlice under a log then boil them. He claims they are "quite like a tiny shrimp."

Addendum: pill bugs are called CHEESY BUGS in Kent and CHEESEBUGS in Berkshire? God, the UK is depraved. woodlands.co.uk/blog/practical…