Thread by @ArmaniTalks

Signs of a Nice Guy:

Agrees with everything
Giggles a lot
Fidgety body language
Talks fast
Avoids eye contact
Says 'I guess' a lot
Always asks for permission
Pushover
Closet snake
Waits for others to make decisions
Has no life purpose
Bottles up anger

'Dang you literally described me to the tee. But I always thought being nice was a good thing?'

Not quite.

Being kind is a good thing.

'Aren't they the same?'

Nah...

The nice guy will navigate around the truth because of the unpleasant feelings associated with it.

The kind guy will tell the truth despite the unpleasant feelings associated with it.

Being nice seems very good on paper.

But in reality?

It makes your life much harder.

Human nature does not take kindly to nice guys.

'How do you know this?'

Because I used to be the nice guy.

And plenty of people that you consider confident were once nice guys themselves.

They were highly agreeable, a people pleaser & allowed others opinions to dictate their reality.

'Do you know the core reason for being a nice guy?'

Ya.

You lack a life mission.

It ALL starts with that.

When you lack a life mission, you are an aimless bag flowing in the wind.

You aren't quite sure what the point of life is.

So your brain assigns your life value thru the opinions of others.

Which is why you are EXTRA cautious about getting their approval.

-You agree with things that you actually disagree with.

-You laugh a lot hoping they will like you quicker.

-You ask them for permission because you think you are not worthy of being assertive.

All because you want them to like you.

'Well, are they liking me??'

Nope.

Exact opposite.

They are repulsed by you.

'Repulsed?? Why?'

Because of human nature.

To their conscious mind, you are doing all the right things.

But to their subconscious mind? Something doesn't seem right.

Their subconscious mind can tell that you are being fake.

Which is why they FEEL weird around you.

You seek their approval, but you get the exact opposite.

You become a doormat in the social world.

Becoming a doormat from the people that you crave acceptance from kills your self-esteem.....

But I'm here to tell you that doesn't have to be the case!

You just need a life purpose.

You need to find your north star.

Once you do, your mind will focus more on the north star than other people's opinions.

Once the refocus happens, proving your worth to others becomes LAUGHABLE.

Instead, something magical happens.

'What?'

You see if others are worthy of entering your world.

That's when you take back control of your life.

And guess what?

'What??'

When you take back control, you give off a different ENERGY to the world.

You are much more poised, calm & confident.

Others are now drawn to you.

Get it?

YOU ARE MOST LIKED WHEN YOU DON'T CARE IF YOU ARE LIKED.

Now with this new power comes great responsibility.

Use your confident energy to construct not destruct.

Build yourself up & empower others along the way.

But ALWAYS keep it real:

Nice = Fake message + Positive Delivery
Kind = Real message + Positive Delivery

Kind>>Nice

With that being said, if you're the nice guy, don't beat yourself up.

That does nothing.

Go on & do something about it!

Get off your ass & experiment until you find something that clicks with you.

Once you find it, do it a lot and master it!

-Finding your North Star 101.

Once you tackle the root of the problem, the side effects of the Nice Guy will melt away.

You will attract, no longer chase.

You will command respect, rather than seek it.

You will feel whole.

Life will never be the same.

For more mind tips, Follow your boi @ArmaniTalks