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[CN:rape] OK there appear to still be some people following me who are - let's be polite - ill-informed enough to believe that saying "You're so ugly I wouldn't even rape you" is somehow NOT a rape threat - even that it is the opposite of a rape threat. let me to try to explain.>
Stating whether you would choose to rape someone else only makes any kind of sense if you are asserting that you have the power to decide whether the other person gets raped by you or not - that the outcome is within your gift. >
It is a statement or a reminder that even though I am choosing not to rape you today, I might change my mind about that at any time. Saying "I won't rape you, because [reasons]" means "But I would rape you or someone else if circumstances were different."
So that's a strong reason why "I wouldn't even rape you" is indeed an unequivocal rape threat. But there's more to it than that. When you raise the spectre of rape, as a possibility, with someone who feels themselves at risk of being raped >
[in which category we can count pretty much all women at any time, but in some circs men & boys too] what you are doing is throwing the possibility of rape into the argument in a way that is intended purely & simply to terrorise, intimidate & assert power & control >
and those who know anything about sexual violence will tell you that in most cases the principal intention of such attacks is usually to terrorise, intimidate & assert power & control & any gratification comes from *that* & not the physical contact itself. >
So to be slightly blunt about it, when someone says "I wouldn't even rape you" they are displaying behaviour that is entirely in keeping with the mindset of a rapist, and that is read loud & clear by the person on the receiving end, just as intended.
2 points in conclusion. 1/ this isn't really aimed at the likes of Carl Benjamin, who's far beyond help, but to those all over social media defending him, I'd ask you, is this really the hill you want to die on? Really? Is this really the frontier of the free speech debate? >
2/ Everything I've said here I've been able to understand & try to explain 'coz I took the trouble to listen to those (almost invariably) women who took the trouble to explain. If you won't hear it from them, perhaps you'll listen to me. Then maybe have a think about why that is.
/ENDS
