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Ever notice that "spend company money like it's your personal money" is dogshit advice steeped in privilege? It leads to people feeling guilty, and that's awful.
I don't see folks sharing their corporate expense policies in public very often, so I'll buck that trend.
To be very clear, attorneys see some issues with this policy, but true story: lawyers work for the business and implement business asks. This is our fault, not counsel's.
Instead of a "do not buy a car for a three day business trip" policy; we instead need to fire the hypothetical moron who makes us think we do.
Behold: The Duckbill Group Expense Policy
If you're traveling for business, fly business class. If it's not worth the money, it's certainly not worth your time to go. Airline and hotel choices are left to you.
If you save a few hundred bucks by taking circuitous routings, consider not doing that. Your time and contentment are worth far more than the savings.
You have a corporate credit card because money only flows one way--from the company to you. You work here; you aren't expected to finance the company.
Want to use a personal credit card instead of the corporate card to earn points? Go for it! Please submit your expenses monthly if feasible to avoid Surprise Accounting. In turn, we will reimburse you rapidly.
Our meal policy is "eat well." We don't care what the GSA rates are. If you want to go to a fine dining restaurant, do so. If you want to grab a sandwich, that's fine.
As a rule of thumb, is something less than $500? Go ahead and buy it. We trust you and by extension your judgement.
If that still leaves you anxious, try these questions to help yourself feel comfortable making the decision:
Will it make doing my job easier? Will it put me in a better mood? Will it contribute positively to my mental health? Will it spark joy? If the answer to any of those is yes, buy it.
The IRS wants receipts for all expenses over $75 and all hotels, so we do too. If you screw up and don't get a receipt, we'll deal with it; please don't panic or do something rash.
Hate doing your expenses? Us too. We have an Executive Assistant for a reason; please use them early and often.
Feel free to ask about any of these; they're all guidelines, not rules. We trust you.
Oh, I apparently need to mention: sorry, we're not hiring at the moment. This isn't self promotion so much as a rant about crappy expense policies.
