Thread by @EmotionsDoctor

The Qualities Of An Emotionally Intelligent Partner.

For the longest time, I believed that love was the only thing necessary to maintain a healthy relationship.

Right? We all dream about a perfect future alongside a loving partner, without even considering the emotional qualities necessary to maintain a healthy relationship.

Consequently, it becomes difficult to communicate, arguments become commonplace, and you’re both left wondering why you even got together in the first place. Sooner or later, you realize that something desperately needs to change.

Throughout my life, I’ve found myself in that position multiple times. But instead of dwelling on the past, I decided to learn emotional intelligence to strengthen my future relationships.

Below are a couple of qualities that have massively improved my life over the past few years. Each one of them helped me to become a more emotionally intelligent person, and I hope they do the same for you, too.

Empathy.

Whenever someone is upset, I try to put myself in their shoes to understand what’s going through their mind.

This simple process is life-changing. Because when you choose to be empathetic within your relationships, you share & understand the feelings of other people, so they don’t have to deal with problems alone.

But how do U become more empathetic? Start by thinking about your relationships and questioning how you can relate to others on an emotional level. E.g
Understand each other’s love languages, & be respectful of the fact that you may have different ways of communicating affection.

Focus on the positive actions of your partner, instead of worrying about their characteristics which annoy you.

Consider their point of view during an argument and try to understand how they got to a conclusion.

I’ve come to realize that empathy is a superpower that can massively open your mind, strengthen your relationship, and change the way you see the world.

As Barack Obama, once so beautifully said: “Learning to stand in somebody else’s shoes, to see through their eyes, that’s how peace begins. And it’s up to you to make that happen. Empathy is a quality of character that can change the world.”

Self-awareness.

Self-awareness is something that I used to find extremely difficult. Every day, I’d wake up, get into constant arguments with friends & family, and have no clue why I had zero respect towards others.

But after a period of self-reflection, I discovered that a lack of emotional intelligence was to blame for my narcissistic actions towards friends & family.

I’ve realized that before U try to understand the world, U first need to understand yourself & your way of thinking. So I began watching videos on psychology to understand my behavior, & how to change it into somebody who’s incredibly empathetic for their inner circle.

When you choose to become more emotionally intelligent, your entire life will change due to a new ability to understand the world with an open heart. In the words of Seneca:

“One of the most beautiful qualities of true friendship is to understand and to be understood.”

If you want to have a happier life, emotional intelligence is the best place to start.

So every day, ask yourself: “What can I do today to understand & improve the lives of those around me?”

That’s how to become an emotionally intelligent partner.

- Written by Matt Lillywite

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