Thread by @choffstein

1/ As I've gotten older, I've actively tried to stop giving advice.

Which at first sounds bad, but let me explain...

2/ I was fortunate to grow up in a family with a parent who was a multi-time entrepreneur; my father ended his career taking a company public during the dot-com bubble.

3/ As someone who owns his own business, I treasure my father's wisdom.

Whenever I ask him for advice, however, he refuses to give it. Not outright; he'll just tell me some story from his time working instead.

Which used to really annoy me.

4/ But as I got older, I realized that it is this way of saying,

"I have no idea what you're going through. I went through something that sounds similar, but the stage and actors are all different.

Let me tell you my story and you decide if it's relevant."

5/ Which, in my opinion, takes a huge amount of humility.

And, in my opinion, is ultimately far more useful.

Because the circumstances and players are different. Without truly knowing all the details, how can you ever really give advice?

6/ So I strive to adopt the same approach whenever someone asks me.

And if I don't have a relatable story, I just ask questions and hope that it helps them process by thinking through the problem from a different angle.

7/ I've also found someone's willingness to tell you what you should or should not do – especially when they have little understanding of the circumstances – speaks volumes about their character.

8/ Anyway, no real point here other than to say:

My advice to you is to stop giving advice.

Just kidding.

But I hope my story about my father gives you something to think about.