'Take me to your leader'
'that'll be me'.
They beamed me into the glistening chrome ship.
'We have come to 'earth' with a view to ravaging the planet's resources and enslaving humanity'
'listen mate, you're welcome to try, but you've just invited the UKs Leading Patriot and foremost military reservist behind enemy lines. Do you really want to try me?'
There was a long pause.
'Sorry wrong planet' said the voice.