Thread by @chubbyshek

So here's a wholesome Twitter Story fam.

(being tweeted with the permission of the concerned person)

About 3 years ago, I first tweeted the below image.

It blew up more than I expected it to.

A lot of people messaged me. And still message me.

I am sharing just one story...

https://twitter.com/chubbyshek/status/885890293811224576

So this one girl from Bangalore messaged me sometimes in early 2018.

She was studying engineering at the time. A history of abuse, led to mistrust, which ended her relationship and affected her studies.

She had been driven to the point where she contemplated ending it all.

When she messaged me, she made an Alt. account.

These was one of her first messages.

"I don't trust anyone and so I won't be able to give you any personally identifiable information. Is that OK?"

My response was..

*I don't need any information about you to talk to you. Consider this a safe space. No judgement. No info needed. Just vent away. I am not a doctor, I don't record chats and delete them at the end of everyday"

And thus began our talks.

The first few months were rough. Very rough.

The poor soul had been through a lot. She had no friends in college, no one to talk to at home.

A social pariah, if you will.

But she's a human. A beautiful soul who cared about everyone and anyone around her.

As the months progressed, the intensity of her messages increased.

Increased interaction is a major manifestation of trust.

However, I could see that her troubles didn't seem to go anywhere.

So I decided to do one thing - make her do something outside her regular routine.

I slowly and very carefully began asking her what interested her.

She mentioned all the usuals - painting, photography, music etc.

But one thing that stood out for me was her mention of Pottery.

I decided to do something about it.

I found several pottery workshops in Bangalore. Called them to confirm timings and cost, created a Google Sheet and sent it to her.

This was something that she could have looked up online.

But when the going gets tough - stuff like this is the last thing you want to do.

She took weeks to make a decision. I asked her about it everyday.

Finally, she agreed to go to a 3-day workshop, that coincided with a long weekend.

I told her I didn't want the name of the workshop. But I want proof that she did visit. I want pics even if of a lump of clay.

*Big Surprise! I suck at pottery too! Like everything else in my life.*

This was the message waiting for me that evening. She refused to ever go again.

I somehow cajoled her into giving one more try.

I told her about how practice makes perfect and the usual diatribe followed

The next day, she sent me a picture of a small pot.

*I made this 🤭* was her caption.

I had found an in. And she was happy.

An iota of happiness, is way better than none at all.

Been through it, gone through that.

She had also made friends. A group of young people goofing off of Pottery.

Whatsapp groups happened for them and they all started hanging out.

Finally, we were getting someplace.

The thing about depression is - it comes and goes.

Just when life seems alright, it pulls you in to the darkness.

My next suggestion was going to be joining a dance class or a gym.

But before I could say that, one of her new friends already suggested and they signed up.

So now, her weekdays were

- College
- Dance class
- Coaching
- Friends

Weekends were -

- Pottery
- Reading books (I setup reading challenges for her)
- Writing (She was eloquent as she wrote in my texts, I encouraged her to pursue writing too).

Then came a dark day. The relative who had abused her came to visit.

She pleaded with her parents at first to let her stay at a friend's house. (She hadn't talked to them about the abuse).

I strongly suggested informing them. She was extremely apprehensive.

She messaged me late in the night to vent. She told me every little detail of what had happened. I was horrified.

We were talking. I was trying to figure out how to keep her from reliving that trauma. No one and I mean no one should have to go through this.

Then it happened...

Be it for my constantly telling her to talk to her parents, or a ball dropping in her head, or her trauma, or her own calculated instincts.

At 2 PM, she replied

*Alright, I am going to do it. I am telling Ma and Pa, right now*

I was relieved, except for the time....

She didn't reply for a couple hours. I was extremely worried.

Had a flight early next morning, so I decided to stay up and began doing the one thing that I do when anxious - Writing.

I wasn't so sure of the outcome, so this was the first time I left my number for her.

Then...

At around 4.30 AM - she texted.

*You there?*

*Yes! All good over there? Did you talk to your parents?*

*Yes I did. And you won't believe what happened, my father scolded me and was really angry.*

My heart sank...

*What?*

*He was angry because I didn't tell him earlier. Mom was sad that I didn't trust them enough to talk about this.*

*______ is arriving at around 6*

*He is driving me and my younger brother to Ajja's (Grandpa) house in 20 minutes. I'll text you later *

What followed are what good dreams are made of.

Her parents berated the abuser in front of his family (wife and mother).

They banned him from ever coming to their place, calling them or even talking about them to others.

And kicked him out within an hour of his arrival.

At 9, her dad went to pick up his daughter. And told her grandparents what had transpired.

Her Grandma called up her sister (Abusers mother) and shared a mouthful. Her granddad was ready to kill the fuckwit.

Her parents and grandparents took her out for lunch.

They had a long talk with her. Apologized to her for missing the signs of abuse.

Assured her that her family's still by her side, no matter what.

There was a lot of crying involved.

I got all the details that night.

And ngl, a few tears did escape my eye as I read her texts.

This incident changed her for the better. She was relieved. She had a wall to fall back on.

She started spending more time with her family.

Her mum and grandmum even came along with her for a few of her pottery workshops.

She was now the "pro" in pottery in her family.

The sense of utter accomplishment is delayed gratification. It takes a lot of involvement. But delayed gratification is an amazing feeling.

This girl was living it.

She was transforming into someone new.

And I watched her from this side of my twitter inbox as she blossomed.

There were downtimes yet again. Her studies. Her ex, living in the same locality etc.

While these would seem miniscule to a lot of you reading this, these are essentially triggers. And triggers make you relieve your pain in an instant.

So I came up with s/thing else - a journal

Yes - a journal.

My twitter inbox would now not include regular chats - it would now be a place for her to post her happy thoughts and her sad thoughts.

At the end of the day she'd post 👆 which marked the end of her journal and then I'd reply.

Restricted conversation.

She slacked for a good month or so. It's hard to form a habit.

But then around her final exams - she picked up.

She religiously wrote every thing that made her happy or sad

- They went to the movies, but didn't ask me. ☹️
- X asked me to study together 😊
- Made Pasta today 😋

She completed her exams. Her final project went good too. And she cleared her engineering last year.

Then came the job hunting.

I would've happily made recommendations for her, except I didn't even know her first name.

She faced rejections after rejections.

I egged her on.

She had to keep on going for interviews. There were no two ways about it.

She didn't want to study further. And wanted a job at any cost.

And then around the first week of February - something magical happened.

She was now assisting in a pottery class every other weekend.

And one weekend, in between workshops she was discussing her not getting a job, when an attendee chimed in.

She asked about her qualifications, then asked..

*How good are you with xxxxx?*

*It was in my course.*

*So you are familiar with it? *

*I am, yes*

*Can you become at least semi-proficient in 10 days? There's tons of material available online *

*I can try*

*Great. I work at (big IT) and can get you shortlisted for an interview straight with my boss*

*Wow! Thank you so much*

She then worked her ass off, studying everything about that technology.

Straight up made a github profile writing sample codes.

Went to the interview and fucking killed.

On the 21st of last month, she got her offer letter.

On the 27th, she had a meeting with her team of 8.

She joined on the 2nd of March.

And took miniature pots for each of her team members.

Today, her team took her out to lunch. They had a blast.

And this is the message I received.

This message. (sorry forgot to add image in last tweet)

Have also cropped much of what she said, as those are her personal feelings.

But this right here. This is delayed gratification for me.

She's happy! ❤️ That's all that matters.

Wrote this entire thread on Mobile, while sitting at an Airport.

Please excuse typos and/or brevity.