Thread by @scottlynch78

So, I drew you a cartoon. It's about a guy named Eggbert. And there's a thread that goes with poor Eggbert...

1. Not long ago I gave y'all a stern fatherly lecture about some concepts that were pounded into my head by years of hazmat and EMT training, and as our collective situation is what we might politely call "in flux," I've got some important new stuff for you.

2. The best advice at the present time is to cover your nose and mouth to slow or prevent transmission of the virus when you must enter a potential exposure situation (work outside the home, shopping, essential errands).

3. We can have pedantic arguments all day about whether this is primarily a measure taken for the benefit of others or for the benefit of oneself. Be pedantic elsewhere. It aids both purposes.

4. Now, last thread, I strongly cautioned you against throwing on a mask and running off into the world with a fresh spirit of immortality. I did not offer these cautions because masks "don't work," but because people have a bad habit of thinking of them as magic charms.

5. A piece of personal protective equipment LOWERS risk, but it does not ELIMINATE it, especially when you use it in a cavalier and ignorant fashion. This can give a sense of false confidence. False confidence gets people turned into casualties.

6. Life preservers are great. But wearing a life preserver doesn’t mean the ship you’re on can’t sink. It doesn’t mean you can’t get swamped by a tall wave. It doesn’t mean you can’t die of exposure while floating in cold water. It's a risk reducer, not fuckin' magic.

7. If you're standing on shore watching a ship pitch and roll and start to come apart, you don't say "I'll swim out there and hop aboard, it's fine, I've got a flotation vest." The situation is dire, and that's a bad time to assume your PPE has limitless powers.

8. In a pandemic, in the world at large right now, a lot of us could walk into the equivalent of pitching and tossing ships at any moment out there. The problem is, these situations are mostly silent and invisible, so maintaining discipline against them requires concentration.

9. Let's talk about that discipline. First, while all the talk right now is masks this and masks that, you need to remember the undefeated champion of hazardous exposures was, is, and always shall be your hands. Hands, people. Wash them! Glove them!

10. If you're in a situation where you're wearing a mask, that means you should also be covering your hands. The real overture to an emergency medical response isn't a siren, it's the "snap-snap" of disposable gloves going on responders' hands.

11. Now, the really important part, which means it's the hard part. If you're going to wear PPE due to an ongoing biohazard, which this mess is, you need to COMMIT. You cannot sorta kinda half-assedly mask and glove up in public if the mood strikes you, maybe.

12. If you are wearing a mask, you CANNOT. CASUALLY. FIDDLE. WITH. IT. Do not reach under it to scratch an itch. Use the mask material itself, gently. Do not smoke through it. Do not take it on and off between bites of food or sips of drink.

13. Eggbert was inspired by someone else mentioning that they'd seen a man wearing mask and gloves buy a hot dog, remove all of his protective gear, then eat the hot dog, then put his gear back on. What a momentously stupid thing to do.

14. When you wear a mask and gloves in public, you must assume, as a matter of routine, that their surfaces are contaminated during and after use. The issue at hand isn't just a little bit of dust or pollen, sorry. It's contagious virus particles.

15. No, you can't take your mask off "just to talk." No, you can't take it off "because you know the people around you." Half-wearing it over just your mouth doesn't help anyone. Biohazards don't give you points for fucking effort.

16. You don your personal protective equipment. You go into the area of risk (the world at large, alas) and keep your PPE on. When you leave the area of risk, you carefully remove your PPE, wash/clean yourself, then wash/store or dispose of your PPE.

17. Don't be this guy. Now your mask has a hole in it, and you're going to be fiddling with it to adjust and remove your cigarette, and as an added bonus you have a chance of setting it on fire, which is not the commonly desired surgical mask user experience.

18. While you're at it, don't be this guy! That mask...

is for snorkeling.

There's no FILTER in that fucking air tube! It doesn't do anything! Except expose the wearer to the same dangers as before, only now he gets to look like the fucking Czar of All the Douchebags.

19. Don't wear scenester masks with studs or rivets piercing the casing; those masks are compromised. Don't wear athletic breath restriction masks. None of this stuff is actually PPE. None of it prevents exposure.

20. Glasses are preferentially worn OVER a mask, not under it. If you attempt to wear them under glasses, they will both break the seal around your nose and rapidly fog up your glasses. See this? Don't do this.

21. Speaking of glasses, they are a surface that can gather viral particles, too. Sanitize them frequently. Don't fiddle with them and then touch your eyes or mouth. Wash them when you return home.

22. Treat the exposed outer surface of a mask as a hazard at all times, because if it stops anything from reaching you, that's where the "anything" stays. Again, do not fiddle with it and then touch food, drink, medication, human skin, anything. Discipline is tedious. I'm sorry.

23. PPE is meant to be worn for a -limited- time as you -reluctantly tolerate- being in a hazardous situation.

It is not meant to encourage you to run eagerly toward one, or to prolong your exposure longer than you should.

It’s. Not. Magic.

Bonus visual: Best practice for removing a contaminated glove with minimal cross-contamination (you still need to wash afterward, of course).

Mistype here, sorry. "If you attempt to wear masks over glasses" is what it should say.