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i am never surprised by the horrible shit men will do to stave off the terror of feeling dependent, inadequate, dominated, out of power ...
... by the fever dream of entitlement, the desperate lies we tell ourselves, the starvation of human emotion that results when every ...
...interaction is a struggle to dominate and failing to dominate feels like destruction....
...every oppressor class imagines themselves oppressed because the removal of privilege feels like death, but sexism is uniquely cruel...
...b/c it demands of men that, to be men, we poison our first & deepest love relationships w/ contempt, & conceal this from ourselves...
...if you wanted, from first principles, to design a broken & dangerous group of humans, you'd teach them love os weakness...
...dominance is safety, vulnerability is danger & that they are entitled to everything & losers if they cannot win it...
...& that losers are undeserving of love, of existence, that not winning is oblivion. and this is no accident. like other oppressions...
...sexism has a functional design & purpose in maintaining status-hierarchy societies. you cannot get a large # of humans to reliably...
...kill other humans w/o mangling their ability to feel, their self-knowledge, & their self-trust as emotional agents...
...but it's not just the soldier class; the pattern developed there permeates the rest of patriarchy. My own conversational style, even...
...after 40+ years of struggle, is warped by the dictates of scholar-class patriarchal emotional starvation & warfare....
...tl:dr; men be fucked up; we are brutal to boys to make them brutal, much of it invisible to us; hug your sons & expect humanity of them.
i hope none of this sounds like "oh poor men, so coddle oppression"
denounce men's behavior, destroy men's privilege, have zero tolerance...
denounce men's behavior, destroy men's privilege, have zero tolerance...
...for sexism. expect men to act like fucking humans. a command to heal, not an excuse to avoid healing. cutting it the fuck out is step 1
