Thread by @everywhereist

I would like to take a moment to discuss something that has always bothered me every holiday season.

I think it's weird that the Whos down in Whoville and The Grinch are carnivores.

It is safe to assume that the Whos and the Grinch are mammals. They appear to be, anyway. And we can safely assume that the Roast beast is, too, though it might possess a cloven hoof (which the Whos and the Grinch do not appear to).

But there is something, something about the shape and size of the roast beast that I find unnerving. It is not altogether that different from the shape of the Grinch or the Whos themselves.

And then there is the vagueness of the term "roast beast". If someone served me that at their home, I would immediately want to know what, specifically, it was. If it was shaped roughly like a person, this would be doubly true.

Granted, I eat meat. Many, many humans do. But we tend to, as a species, generally stay away from other primates, particularly those that are similar in size to us.

I do not think that the Whos are restricted by those same taboos.

The narrative also seems to suggest that the Grinch is not a Who. Aesthetically, he is different - covered entirely in fur, while the Whos seem to have a delineation between the dermis and their hair, as Cindy Loo Who illustrates.

(Gosh, she's cute. And possibly a cannibal.)

What was the source of the rift between the Whos and the Grinch? We never find out, but I have my suspicions. See, the Grinch hates their joy, and I wonder if he finds mirth in the face of cannibalism offensive.

Yes, cannibalism.

Remember how he takes the last can of Who Hash? What the hell is Who Hash? Naming conventions would suggest it is A HASH MADE OF WHO. Food is not named for who consumes it. It's named for ingredients. E.g., corn beef hash.

WHO HASH CONTAINS WHOS. And it's commercially produced.

Which means this cannibalism is wide-spread.

Now, take the Grinch - already an outlier by appearance. If the Who are willing to eat their own, what's stopping them from eating someone a little different? NOTHING.

The Grinch knew this. So he fled town.

But then, eventually, they win him over with their cult-like resilience and hypnotic song. And without a clear reason why, he goes to them. HE IS IN A TRANCE.

And then "the Grinch himself even carved the roast beast" - that's a critical plot point. He is fully assimilated now.

We are left with an idyllic scene - everyone enjoying the vague carcass that may be a forsaken Who.

But what happens the next time the Whos need to feast? Where do you think they will source their meat from?

You know as well as I do.

The Whos are gonna eat the Grinch.

Don't think they've forgotten what the Grinch did to them.

No one forgives that easily.

They're willing to eat their own, so they're more than certainly willing to eat an outsider. Especially one who tried to ruin Christmas.

Anyway, I'm probably just reading too much into it.

But honestly, all the pieces add up.

I wish that Seuss had made them all vegetarians.

/thread.

P.S., if you enjoyed this weirdness, and for some reason want more, please consider checking out my memoir which one reviewer described as "utterly bereft of substance and true insight"

amazon.com/All-Over-Place…