In both cases it's really about sitting with the question, "What are you really trying to do / say?"
"Who are you, exactly?"
"Where are you right now, exactly?"
"Where are you trying to go, exactly?"
If you lack precision on any of these fronts, you'll have a tough time trying to go where you (think you) want to go
It's very helpful to articulate these things out loud and be clear with yourself about them
If you don't know where you're trying to go, it's pretty unlikely that you'll ever get there