, 9 tweets, 2 min read Read on Twitter
Still genuinely can't believe filmmakers can't make a Superman movie that elicits more than a collective shrug these days in this, the year 2019.

We live in an age where Rocket Raccoon is a thing, cinematically speaking, but not Superman.

That amazes me.
Don't get me wrong, "Man of Steel" did fine, financially. It's arguably in that too-big-to-fail sphere, so.

But I still see more genuinely positive reactions to the Superman movie that came out THE YEAR THAT I WAS BORN than the 2013 one.
I have no investment in Superman, but honestly, now seems like the right time to Dad him up. Hire a middle-aged actor to play him, maybe whip up a script full of commentary about America's turn towards authoritarianism. This doesn't seem hard.
Superman out there, trying to Do His Best, understanding he's just one person and can't do it all, maybe glancing behind him and becoming increasingly uncomfortable with his fanbase, now demanding he patrol the US-Mexico border or side with cops on everything.
Maybe going home to the farm (still in his hero outfit) and his elderly mother is making him cocoa and he's like "Mom? Am I a fascist?" And she's like "You're a hero." and He's like "I read some stuff on Twitter."
"Clark, stop it. You help people."
"I foil bank robberies. Doctors w/o Borders HELPS people."
"CLARK."
"Maybe I should stop trying to do this alone."
"You don't, you have your friends on.. in the Hallway, is it?"
"Hall of Justice. But like.. what IS justice."
"Drink your cocoa."
Give Superman a Midlife Crisis, You Cowards
Superman, quietly, into his cocoa: "I didn't know any black people until Cyborg. How do I live in New York and not know any black people? What does that MEAN"
See Also: my Socially Awkward Aquaman posts.
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