Thread by @MollyMcKew

Will tweet thoughts in Cohen hearing in this thread. I have minimal expectations of revelatory information:

Jim Jordan looks like he's pre-gaming a rugby match.

Freedom Caucus gonna Freedom Caucus all day.

This will be an embarrassment to conservatives everywhere for the duration of the day.

As Mark Meadows is every day. And everyone who has ever defended his carnival act.

Freedom clowns now going with CNN conspiracies again.

All of this is designed to psych out Cohen

Today's verb of the day will be "to beclown"

add it to your drinking game

JJ & MM -- so far 2 beclown points apiece

Adequate cocktails for today include only straight spirits and liquor. You may have ice before noon.

Beclown score: JJ 3, MM 0

JJ lays in, so far, CNN conspiracies, Clinton conspiracies -- waiting for the space aliens

The only point of truth: if your life is on the line, god help you if your "lawyer" is lanny davis.

** Beclown: JJ 3, MM 2

mistyped.

Someone pass Cohen the flask.

JJ 4, MM 2

JJ adds Tom Steyer conspiracies to his list of flaming garbage. Freedom clowns are so f*cking ridiculous --- oh, now there's Fusion GPS and Steele conspiracies too

JJ 7, MM 2

Ohio, do better.

If this were UK parliament, Cummings would whack JJ with his gavel at least once today.

Cohen should have this line ready for Freedom Clowns:

"Congressmen, let me be your cautionary tale about what happens to people who serve Trump with blind loyalty."

100% sounded like Cohen said Trump is good in bed (it was really "good and bad") -- but for a minute I lol-ed

BTW I hate this line, because it is the core of the Trump innocence/no-collusion narrative: Trump only did this for money, didn't understand what he was doing.

Nope.

POTUS has made us a country where using "shithole" in testimony before congress doesn't warrant a blink.

Cohen testimony = good reminder that the adjective is the enemy of the noun.

Cohen's statement emphasizes he had no knowledge of Trump Tower/Veselnitskaya meeting until he read about it in the press.

I would be curious to know if that is actually true.

"I never expected I/my family would be a target of the president's attacks" says everyone who has ever watched a malignant narcissist destroy others and said nothing, only to find the sun turn away from them.

Someone just caught Cohen's eye, and he smiled, while being yelled at by Cummings about the seriousness of lying.

I wonder who it was.

Just imagine the character of a person who would ask you to borrow against the value of your home to pay off a porn star, only to then demean you by paying you back in installments, without interest.

Current beclown score: JJ 7, MM 2
JJ will now tally up more points.

Cohen names Ivanka and the boys as beneficiaries of this system of corruption, which seems important vis a vis the future.

JJ will just keep attacking character of Cohen. It's not a bad strategy.

JJ now at 8 beclown points for mentioning "Women4Cohen" fake twitter

" we were having fun" is never a good answer for deceptive and/or criminal activity

Ok, to be fair I am deducting 2 points from JJ because his line of questioning was well-constructed to expose Cohen deficiencies and potential motivation for his testimony.

JJ 6, MM 2

Wasserman Schultz line of questioning backfires, as Cohen equivocates on everything in a way that makes me wonder why he is here, exactly.
Trump's desire to win is everything, says Cohen, but he didn't think he would win and it was just re money? Those points don't line up

Second R questioner also Freedom Caucus.
Mark Green is only angling for a Fox News clip reel.

JJ 6, MM 2, MG 1

JJ 7 because trying to say there is a conspiracy with SCO.

MSNBC's random facts on congressmen are A+ btw

Matt Gaetz, who is not on the committee, standing on R side of committee now, creating initials issues for me on the clowns.

JJ 7, MM 2, MG 1, MGz 1

The entire republican strategy is distraction -- to make the issue Cohen, and not POTUS.
Cohen is actually handling this well by accepting responsibility (mostly). But he needs to not get angry and defensive.

Let's hope the Ds don't plan to keep replying to this by wasting their time on questions that aren't important, which they haven't read in advance, and which they don't understand why they are asking.

This entire hearing is a case study in how the rise of Trump is the elevation of #DVG in our society.

(DVG = dumb vain greedy)

MM now brings in a black Trump org staffer as a prop for his argument that POTUS is not racist. Also makes a play to say there are no tapes of proof.

Doesn't like it when Cohen points out there are no senior people of color in Trump org.

JJ 7, MM 4, MG 1, MGz 1

MM 6 just because I loathe this cartoon so much.

This is a complete waste of time.

Cohen is getting flustered. This may go south fast.

I don't like the D line of questioning, though it is helping to show the consistent charlatanry with with POTUS spun his image from the air over decades.

I'm going to go back to the failed Meadows stunt -- bringing in black Trump staffer as a prop -- because it shows that there is coordination between the Trump family and the Freedom Caucus on this hearing.

Who paid for her travel to the hearing, eh clowns?

Now questions from Jody Hice -- another Freedom Caucus clown.
So many clowns in this clown car.
Cites three conspiracies re Tom Steyer, Lanny Davis, space aliens.
For a former radio host, English seems quite challenging for him

Beclown score: JJ 7, MM 6, MG 1, Mgz 1, JH 3

Rep Lynch A+ for bold tie, list of guilty/convicted Trumpworld goons, plus A++ Mass accent

Cohen getting defensive which is not good.

JJ just warned 7 points for amazing list of conspiracies -- comey sztrok page baker etc -- plus rod rosenstein plus 25th amendment, plus lanny davis payments conspiracies.

JJ 14, MM 6, MG 1, MGz1, JH 3

Oh god, another freedom clown: paul gosar

Dear conservatives: you have failed so marvelously in your quests against Ds these last years because your oversight committee is staffed with these carnies. This is an embarrassment to watch in ways that make me want to turn the channel.

JJ 14, MM 6, MG 1, Mgz 1, JH 3, PG 2

Ok, Cohen literally just said this, so I am taking credit

https://twitter.com/MollyMcKew/status/1100780230585864192

It's not a great legal strategy probably but I am enjoying Cohen's righteous rant against Trumpism and his explanation of how morally corrupt you have to be to stand with him.

I have many issues with Cohen.
But calling out members of Congress for being clowns as he was once a clown -- that takes some serious balls and ZFG.
None of this is easy to do. He gets credit for that.

Musings on break time crowd shots:
Any crowd in DC is proof that big hair is grossly over-represented in the American political class.

Also the JJ no suit jacket, untailored shirt/cheap tie look really does make him look like a wrestling coach all the time. No, this does not matter -- but it makes it impossible not to think about it.

JJ gets +4 for the convoluted "why didn't you tell the American public the truth on a story where you were not responsible for the content" point. Sheesh.

JJ 18, MM 6, MG 1, Mgz 1, JH 3, PG 2

Cohen lecturing Freedom Caucus for not asking about POTUS = A+

Connolly calls out R strategy with excellent recitation of facts.

Connolly did a good job of getting Cohen to describe environment in which POTUS states his version of reality, and expects you to make it true.

Massie on the board with payment conspiracies, incomprehensible English.

JJ 18, MM 6, MG 1, Mgz 1, JH 3, PG 2, TM 2

Smart line of questioning from Krishnamoorthi on language and purpose of Trump NDAs.

Cohen's evasive answer on who is under NDA is... odd.

You know. I was going to credit Cloud for relying on the Cohen sentencing memo (-1) but he ends up at null because he went back to a book deal question.

MM trying really hard to find a FARA violation for Cohen.

JJ 18, MM 6, MG 1, Mgz 1, JH 3, PG 2, TM 2

A+ from Grothman for mentioning it is bunk that Trump wasn't trying to win, didn't think he would win.

MM + but -1 because he isn't wrong about the form but wants it to be a conspiracy

JJ 18, MM 6, MG 1, Mgz 1, JH 3, PG 2, TM 2

Harley Rouda gets ❤️❤️ from me b/c ousted Rohrabacher, asks about Sater.

Cohen downplaying Russian transactions at Trump org. Cohen downplayed idea of kompromat on Trump earlier. He seems to have interesting areas where he has no visibility.

I think it's pretty clear why SDNY says Cohen not open and fully cooperating.
It's pretty clear Cohen isn't afraid of Trump anymore.
But he's afraid of something or he would have taken a full cooperation deal.

Katie Hill is such a solid addition to Congress.
Just debunked an MM conspiracy.
Points out real point of this hearing -- the president.

on beclown score:
Amash deserves credit for civility and normalcy, toward the team score

JJ 18, MM 6, MG 1, Mgz 1, JH 3, PG 2, TM 2, JA -2

Gibbs + 2 even tho not freedom caucus because conspiracies.

Sarbanes -- guy you don;t want to end up a blind date with, because time becomes endless.

Higgins -- gross tactics re "you remind me of all criminals"

Cohen helpfully offers additional details in an answer to a question clarifying he doesn't think Trump knew about content of wikileaks dump, just that he know dump was coming. k.

Things Cohen will speak ill of:
Trump

Things Cohen will not speak ill of:
Russia
Melania

Well I guess we know what was in the pre-game R talkers.

BOOK DEALS
LANNY DAVIS
GRIFTERS AND LIARS.

Zzzzzzz

The thing with Melania is getting weird.

During break:

Russian state TV rarely covers Trump-related investigations but broadcast some of Cohen testimony live, including questions about potential collusion/Moscow deal.

"the suspicion of collusion with Russia — well, Cohen does not have evidence of that" they say

Interesting they knew which parts to air live, I guess.

Ok sorry had to do a long documentary thing -- here's the final beclown score:

JJ 18, MM 14, MG 1, Mgz 1, JH 3, PG 2, TM 2, JA -2, +2 team score

41 total

An impressive haul

There was nothing learned in this hearing, except that this is why we need team Mueller, which should never be disbanded.