, 15 tweets, 3 min read Read on Twitter
So let me get this right:

Rory Stewart, an absolute bastard who voted in favour of Theresa May's unlawfully racist Hostile Environment is the guy everyone's suddenly fawning over.

Have you all lost your tiny little minds?
So let me get this right:

Rory Stewart, an absolute git who voted to slash disability benefits for people who have been declared too unwell to work is the guy everyone thinks is lovely?

Has everyone gone completely crazy?
So let me get this right:

Rory Stewart, an pro-Brexit Tory who backed Theresa May's shambolic deal x3, refused to rule out a "no deal" meltdown, and reaches out to Farage to help him deliver Brexit is the guy the #FBPE drones are drooling over?

What are you people thinking?
So let me get this right:

Rory Stewart, a terrible wanker who repeatedly voted in favour ruinous Tory austerity fanaticism, public service cuts, wage repression, and welfare vandalism is everyone's straight-talking hero?

Are you all on glue or something?
So let me get this right:

Rory Stewart, a malicious monster who repeatedly voted through Chris Grayling's unlawful Tribunal Fees in order to price ordinary workers out of the justice system is suddenly an infallible political God?

Is this really happening?
So let me get this right:

Rory Stewart, a nasty Tory toff who wants to bring back fox hunting is the guy you're all going soppy for.

Do you all really hate foxes that much?
So let me get this right:

Rory Stewart,a malicious war-mongering bastard who voted in favour of turning Libya into a vast lawless terrorism breeding ground just like Iraq is suddenly Mr. Wonderful!

Are you people even looking at the same Rory Stewart I'm looking at?
So let me get this right:

Rory Stewart, a spectacular hypocrite who got smashed on opium then sat back and said nothing as his Tory colleagues repeatedly brought in draconian new rules to punish drug users is your new political heart throb?

Are you lot on drugs or not?
So let me get this right:

Rory Stewart, a belligerent wrecker who voted through unprecedented cuts to local government funding, policing, fire services, & our kids' education system is the guy you're all fapping yourselves dry over!

Surely you lot can find better wank material?
So let me get this right:

Rory Stewart, a bumbling charlatan whose party halved taxes on fracking, banned onshore wind, and gutted solar subsidies is your new eco-saviour because he walks around in fields talking posh?

Have you seen the state of yourselves?
So let me get this right:

Rory Stewart, a callous uncaring posho whose party repeatedly forces people with permanent degenerative diseases and terminal illnesses to prove that they're not disability fakers is your new "compassionate Conservative" idol.

Who are you people?
So let me get this right:

Rory Stewart, a total charlatan who says he won't serve in a Boris Johnson cabinet, then he will, then he won't again is who you're deifying as the honest straight-talking politician you've been waiting for!

Do you lot want to buy this bridge off me?
So let me get this right:

Rory Stewart, a hard-right knucklehead whose party ruined out national economic potential by reducing infrastructure investment to the lowest level in the developed world is your guy to Make Britain Great Again!

Have you even heard of cause and effect?
So let me get this right:

Rory Stewart, a Tory xenophobe who voted 15x against a right for EU nationals already in living in the UK to remain in the UK after Brexit is your beloved new "centrist" superstar.

How can you even look your EU-born neighbours/colleagues in the eye?
So let me get this right:

Rory Stewart, a Tory thundercunt who voted 23x to slash Corporation Tax as his party simultaneously loaded the cost of the bankers' crash onto the poor & vulnerable is your new beloved darling.

You lot actually like licking Tory jackboots don't you?
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