Thread by @swardley

X : Any pointers on how to create a good culture in an organisation?
Me : Sure, first define culture.
X : The beliefs and common ideals of an organisation.
Me : Sounds like values. Try culture.
X : The way people work together.
Me : Sounds like principles. Try culture.

X : The behaviours of a company.
Me : Sounds like a mix of individual intrinsic and extrinsic behaviours interacting with structure and past memory of an organisation such as rituals. Try culture.
X : You explain what culture is.
Me : In words? I can't. But I can show you a map.

X : What does that mean?
Me : It means approximately 7,140 words to describe the basic form of what is culture i.e. all the nodes and connections. Then a few more thousand words to describe your interactions with it.
X : WTF?
Me : Yep, it's a messy, complex and complicated topic.

X : I'm after something simple?
Me : With culture? You're looking for a 2x2 or something you can just implement, a list of top ten?
X : Yes. Do you have this?
Me : How much money do you have?
X : What has that got to do with anything?
Me : I'm trying to put a price on my guilt.

X : You mean there isn't a simple guide to culture?
Me : If you pay me enough I can pretend there is. Would that help?
X : Not if it's not real, not based on anything.
Me : That doesn't stop people with strategy.

X : I don't have time to dig into this, I need something simple.
Me : Well, you can always use an AI to develop a complex adaptive model for implementation of an open and agile culture.
X : Really? How would I do this?
Me : First, send me a cheque for $100k.

X : What's the money for?
Me : A exceedingly long holiday
X : What do I get out of it?
Me : A valuable lesson.
X : Which is?
Me : Whilst there might be no simple solutions to culture, there are lots and lots of people that you can pay money to.