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Now that John Lewis has shared its Christmas advert, we thought it was about time for us to share ours

Or, at least, the script for it. If we could make one

#ExcitableEdgar, please meet: the Beale Family

#AMERLYChristmas
1/4 Full transcription available here: https://pastebin.com/TLag19gU.
2/4 Full transcription available here: https://pastebin.com/TLag19gU.
3/4 Full transcription available here: https://pastebin.com/TLag19gU.
4/4 Full transcription available here: https://pastebin.com/TLag19gU.
Full transcript:

pastebin.com/TLag19gU.
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The Museum of English Rural Life
@TheMERL
Hello! We're open for business. Annual lecture business.

#MERLAnnualLecture2019
Right now is the pre-lecture, which is great, because, in the pre-lecture hall, we have lots of amazing things to show you.

Including....
limited edition jam

limited edition merlberry jam A photo of jams by a local jam producer - the Caversham Jam Lady. She is the best.
Read 46 tweets
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The Museum of English Rural Life
@TheMERL
Hello, it’s #Halloween: when things go bump in the night, when international pumpkin sales soar through the roof, like a vampire bat on an ejector seat.

As if on cue, strange things have been happpening this week across the museum.

Buckle up.

🎃a haunted thread🎃

PART 1/2
Firstly, you might be aware of this, but in our garden we have two chickens. They live in a little chicken house. Their names are Lines & Puffball. These was chosen by Friday Fledglings, our under 5s group, who we should entrust with more infrastructure decisions than we do.
We have a group that tends to the chickens — a complex machine of many moving parts, that keep the chickens chicking over.

It’s kind of therapeutic, like an SAD light.

Life gets busy. Emails overflow. The soul blocks, spluttering like an old pipe.
Read 37 tweets
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The Museum of English Rural Life
@TheMERL
in the 2020s, we will be amazed—and quite frankly appalled—if chicken grooming doesn't make a major comeback A coloured lithograph of two special breed chickens from Cassell's Book of Poultry, 1880.A coloured lithograph of two special breed chickens from Cassell's Book of Poultry, 1880.
These magnificent lithographic prints are from ‘Cassell’s Book of Poultry’, published in 1880, which we hold in our library.

It’s a fabulous, ground-breaking work – a genre-defying masterpiece of chick-lit.
The text flies through the world of chickens with a passion and devotion that may never be matched. And it starts as it means to continue: relentlessly.

Every book should begin by refusing to apologise for existing. A cropped extract of the Preface of Cassell's Book of Poultry. The opening line, referred to in the tweet, reads: 'For such a work as the present we do not feel that any apology can be either useful or necessary'.
Read 18 tweets

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Jyotih
@RealMightyJoe
#share #thread #poem #qanon #QArmy #realmightyjoe #original
The following is one of my favorite poems I have ever written. On my phone so excuse any typos. I think it's the time to put this out there.
"As I Wept with the Devil"
The Fallen Angel would rather,
Crawl back to the pit of Hell.
Kill himself through his prechosen,
Ritual;
Then to ever have to see the Light,
The Truth.
The face of his Makers,
Mother and Father,
Ever again.
I do believe he truly hates God.
But Worships him still, to this Day.
Secretly,
His Mother he has attempted to erase from his-story.
Storytellers tell it differently.
We will politely dis-agree.
You Have No Power Over Me!
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Xinqi Su
@XinqiSu
#NOW in Tsim Sha Tsui, umbrella-holding protesters have occupied Salisbury Rd and walked into Nathan Road. Not a huge crowd but many are waiting along roads from TST pier.
Cantonese is difficult but not too difficult
@ Nathan Rd, Tsim Sha Tsui
Hold it tight when storm looms - protesting couples in #AntiMaskBan march in Tsim Sha Tsui.
Chan Ka-ming, a pro-democracy district council candidate, is chanting slogan at a TST station exit on Nathan Rd.
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Patrick Chovanec
@prchovanec
In May 1961, a group of interracial civil rights activists journeyed together through the South to challenge the non-enforcement of US Supreme Court rulings outlawing segregation on interstate buses.
Dubbed the “Freedom Riders” and sponsored by the Congress of Racial Equality (CORE), they planned to travel a series of routes taking them from Washington DC to New Orleans.
For the first part of their trip, they only experienced relatively minor harassment. But as they departed Atlanta on May 14, Mother’s Day, they received warnings that a very different welcome awaited them in Alabama.
Read 38 tweets
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Neil Saunders
@NeilRetail
In 1985, US department stores took 14.5% of all retail spend. Last year they took 4.3%. The figure is still falling. The internet is often blamed for this. But the blunt truth is that US department stores just aren’t very good retailers. In fact, most of them are abysmal.
The majority of mainstream stores are uninspiring places. Even in good malls, they are dispiriting and dismal. Investment is severely lacking. They are devoid of inspiration. There’s no reason for people to visit.
Retail basics are lacking. There’s no care. Standards are low. Is it any wonder market share had fallen off a cliff? Why should customers spend their hard earned cash here?
Read 21 tweets
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Wendi C. Thomas
@wendi_c_thomas
Day 3 of the Memphis police surveillance trial set to begin in federal court soon. @mem_police Director Mike Rallings will testify first. Follow me on Twitter at @wendi_c_thomas for updates throughout the day. #MLK50
To catch up, check out @DanielConnolly @memphisnews story: commercialappeal.com/story/news/201…
That’s not a cause for concern at all. The top of @DanielConnolly story from Day 2.
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