Thread by @BeanTownCop

Attention people: rant ahead.

Today, something happened that bothered me to my core. The girl who works at the front desk of my gym is an absolute sweetheart. She’s genuinely just a pure hearted person who always has the biggest smile on her face and goes out of her way to be friendly and welcoming.

Every time I leave the gym, I stop by and say hi. We talk for a few minutes and she tells me about her life; the stress about her college classes, what she did over the weekend, boy troubles, etc. I have never seen her not smile whenever I walk up to her. Today was different.

I walked by like I always do and said “see ya, Ruth!” Without smiling she goes “bye”. I stopped dead in my tracks and turn around. Her face said it all. She was on the verge of a breakdown. So I look at her and go “whose face am I breaking?” She almost breaks and motions me over.

While keeping herself together, she tells me about a personal trainer who cornered her over the weekend while the gym was dead and made an advance on her. She rejected him and he was not having it. Like a classic loser, he goes off about how she’s not even that good looking.

He said she would be a solid 10 if she lost weight around her stomach and arms and physically grabbed the fat around those areas, and then went off about how she’s too uptight and needs to relax. She tells him to stop but he continues berating her and insulting her.

Eventually, he leaves but not before physically grabbing her and telling her that she’ll regret this.

She was obviously mortified and upset about what happened. It’s important to note that this trainer is well liked by the staff and apparently really well qualified. So she debated reporting him but ultimately didn’t. Her reasoning was that she thought no one would believe her.

When she said this, it broke my heart. For a scumbag like that to do something to a girl like that and for her to feel that way, it bothered me down to my soul. She goes on to say that eventually, after telling her mom, she (the mom) convinced her to say something.

So she goes in the next day and reports it to the manager. The manager goes “wait, Tim did this? Do you have proof?” Fam, when she told me that, My jaw hit the floor. This was her exact fear. She goes on to say they “spoke” to him and told him to stay away from the front desk.

That was the extent of the corrective action. She’s telling me this as she has tears forming in her eyes. This girl was sexually harassed and physically assaulted and the fear lost victims have of no one believing them came true.

And to make it worse, now her offender knows she reported him and nothing was done.

Then it was my turn to speak.

The first thing I told her was that I believed her. I didn’t need any video surveillance or anything to know she wasn’t lying. I then told her that if she wanted something done about it, that I’d go to the end of the world to do whatever I can.

I told her that shit like this is exactly why I became a cop; to do something when others won’t, to be that hand that grabs theirs when they’re reaching out for help, and to stand up for those who can’t.

She told me that he was around the desk even though he was told not to, having loud conversations with clients because he knew she wouldn’t do anything about it. This bothered me even more because this asshole is basically showing her that he’s invincible.

Assholes like that thrive off of knowing that they have no resistance and no ones going to do anything. Someone needs to do something, and if management won’t, then i will. Fuck this guy.

I gave her my number and told her that if she EVER felt uncomfortable, if he EVER does anything again, or if he even thinks about retaliating or doing anything, to call me and I’ll be there. And I meant it. I told her to feel no pressure of bothering me or inconveniencing me.

She knows I’m a cop and fortunately my workout schedule overlaps with her work schedule. I told her that I can come later and close with her and walk her to her car. I told her that she doesn’t have to change anything of her schedule to avoid him or fear him.

She’s not the problem and has no reason to do anything.

Next I asked her if it’s ok if she was willing to go to HR about this, and if not, if she’d want me to. She said she wanted to but was afraid of him finding out. I said i understood that apprehension.

I said that the best thing to do though is to document it with them because if management isn’t going to do shit, they will. Sexual harassment is not ok ANYWHERE. She agreed and said she would.

Finally, I told her that if she wanted to escalate this to a police matter,

that I would personally take her to the station and help her report it. She said that she didn’t want him arrested, just transferred so she didn’t have to deal with him. I understood her position and didn’t pressure her anymore. I told her if she changed her mind to let me know.

After talking about her options and forming a game plan, She looked at me and said “thank you for believing me.” And I have no idea how I kept it together but those words almost broke me. Of course I did. Why wouldn’t I? So we’ll handle this and hopefully he gets what’s coming.

If you’re a victim who is going through something similar, I am so sorry. I’m so sorry if you feel like you have to put up with it because you feel like no one will believe you. I am so sorry that people think it’s ok to say/do things to you that aren’t welcome.

I wish I could personally help each of you out; believe me, I mean that with every ounce of my heart. It breaks me knowing how many victims are out there. But please, please, PLEASE, know that there are people out there who will listen and help.

If you’re a cop, be the guardian you signed up to be. I know it’s frustrating at times when you go to a domestic and know the victim won’t prosecute. Understand that there’s more that’s happened in that victims entire relationship that you know from the 15 minutes you spend there

You can’t protect everyone, you can’t fix everyone, and you can’t solve everyone’s problems. But you can sure as fuck try. And for that one person you DO help, you’ve saved them. You’ve brought that person out from hell. And that’s fucking worth it.