In what will go down either as social media's greatest ever public service or an excruciating, tumbleweed attempt at organised fun, I shall be spending the rest of the morning acceding to requests to offer razor sharp legal analysis of popular songs. 🎵
But I didn't shoot no deputy, oh no! Oh!
I shot the sheriff
But I didn't shoot no deputy,
Yeah! All around in my home town,
They're tryin' to track me down;
They say they want to bring me in guilty
For the killing of a deputy,
For the life of a deputy. 🎵
Count 1 - Murder of the sheriff: Guilty
Count 2 - Murder of the deputy: Not Guilty
But closer inspection of the lyrics reveals otherwise...
🎵 Oh, now, now. Oh!
(I shot the sheriff.) - the sheriff.
(But I swear it was in selfdefence.)
Oh, no! (Ooh, ooh, oo-oh) Yeah!
I say: I shot the sheriff - Oh, Lord! -
(And they say it is a capital offence.) 🎵
🎵Sheriff John Brown always hated me,
For what, I don't know:
Every time I plant a seed,
He said kill it before it grow -
He said kill them before they grow.🎵
Plants. Tee hee. Cos it's horticul... never mind. On we go.
🎵 Freedom came my way one day
And I started out of town, yeah!
All of a sudden I saw sheriff John Brown
Aiming to shoot me down,
So I shot - I shot - I shot him down and I say:
If I am guilty I will pay.🎵
Bob is not doing himself favours.
Count 3 - Possession of a firearm with intent to endanger life (s.16 Firearms Act 1968)
Count 4 - Possession of ammunition with intent to endanger life (also s.16)
*No* defence whatsoever has been offered to these counts.