Discover and read the best of Twitter Threads about #dadjokes

Most recents (10)

We need some inspiration. Join us to celebrate people fighting for our planet w/#30EarthMonthHeroes. The rules: 1⃣Tag a person who does great things to protect the environment 2⃣tag+thread another the next day 3⃣Repeat thru April. Explainer via @TaotaoTasi…
1) One of our #30EarthMonthHeroes is our previous president @brooke2cents. Beyond the leadership she provided us, Brooke trains conservationists on how to design outreach plans that motivate action. Check out her work on sustainable fishing in Mongolia:…
Read 31 tweets
(1 / many, you'll see😳) Egypt was beautiful* (more to come on that). First, here are the jaw-dropping photos I took + travel advice:
Can't recommend Pyramids View Inn in Giza enough. This is from the roofdeck where you get breakfast. It's cheaper vs the 2 luxury hotels further away. The staff is honest (so important here), and while they gently steer you into their tours, in most cases, it's a positive upsell.
Day + night view, and a "Stella" beer to go with it. There's a pyramid light show at 7pm in English (free for you from this vantage point), but it's skippable. Could be better if you're viewing it in front of the Sphinx with a paid ticket.🤷🏻‍♂️
Read 32 tweets
After immense prayer & reflection, I'm announcing my candidacy for US Congress in Virginia District 1.

I have conviction in people, not corps, & seek your support to build a more inclusive, compassionate, & fair nation—together. #RashidForVA

Launch Day Update #1:
•Already in the hundreds of donors for today
•$4.20: Smallest donation
•$0 from Mega Corps
•$0 from Corp Super PACS
•1 Dad Joke to be tweeted soon

Our Goal is 1000+ donors today

$5 or $2800—every bit helps. Join in
Wife:What if you don't win?

Me: We have a great team & great constituents—we'll win

Wife: But what if?

Me: Then I'll have to start my backup plan—open a dinosaur themed Mexican Thai fusion restaurant

Wife: Really?

Me: Yep—I'll call it Thairannosaurus Mex😅#DadJokes

Wife: 🤦🏾‍♀️
Read 5 tweets

1.) WE, THE PEQPLE - "Everything has meaning"

Ever since I started following Q in November 2017, I began looking at EVERYTHING differently. It was like an area of my brain that had gone unused was suddenly unlocked.
#TheGreatAwakening #Qanon #WWG1WGA #QArmy #MAGA #KAG
2.) Words, phrases, letters and numbers have taken on new meaning and I no longer read them mindlessly. Using my newfound critical analysis, I zeroed in on Q's signatures.

#QAnon began as "Q Clearance Patriot" in Drop 34 and signed off as "Q" for the first time in Drop 61.
3.) Q+ first surfaces in Drop 791.
Is Q+ @realDonaldTrump?
@POTUS points at @Q_AnonBaby while he's wearing a #QAnon shirt, he meets Trump and asks about Q (DJT says he knows they are good people) and then receives his photo with DJT with (((+))) on back of pic.
Read 17 tweets
Star Wars (1977): The first Millennium Falcon, by @ILMVFX modelmakers.

Aka the "Pirate Ship".

Only the cockpit and the radar dish will be recycled for "our" Millennium Falcon.

A known story. ==> thread.
The design of the "pirate ship" comes from the study model made by Colin Cantwell, from the beginning of 1975.
A design that followed the guidelines of George Lucas.
Read 47 tweets
Happy #FathersDay! And, since we know how much you love our #dadjokes, we're at it again this year!

Share yours with us 👇
How do you make a Kleenex dance? Put a little boogie in it!
When does a joke become a dad joke? When it becomes apparent.
Read 12 tweets
A short thread on running for office in USA as an immigrant

45 ran on the claim that America isn't great & we need to "MAGA"

As I campaign for VA Senate on the premise that we can make VA a better place to live, I'm told, "If you don't like it, go back to the Middle East."

1—I’m not Middle Eastern but racists tend to see all brown people spanning 200 nations as one group anyway

2—Even if I was from the ME, fascinating how xenophobes demand immigrants “assimilate,” and then clutch their pearls when we promote democracy by running for office🤔

Why exactly are so many so afraid of immigrants, people of color, women,& other minorities running for office?

Are they afraid of becoming minorities themselves?

Have minorities been mistreated or something in US history? /s🤔

Their fear makes them lash out, for example:

Read 8 tweets
Hey NYC, I’m the keynote speaker at an event on the life of Prophet Muhammad (sa) this Sunday at 1:30pm EST.

Q/A to follow after the lecture. And yes, I'll be wearing my awesome hat.

Tickets are free for this event but limited seating, so RSVP:
Just arrived at the hotel to speak on Prophet Muhammad (sa) and the first thing I see is a sign for a Psychic conference

For a moment I thought I was in the wrong place because I did Not see that coming.😅

(Our event starts at 2pm!)
Full house and great interfaith gathering at our event on Prophet Muhammad (sa).

I’m speaking in a few minutes on the life of Prophet Muhammad (sa) & peace.
Read 3 tweets
Benefits of having three kids #1:
Absolutely noone (family & others) gives unprompted parenting advice anymore (probably because they gave up).
Benefits of having three kids #2:
Being able to say (in theory) things like: “well, *some* of my kids play Golf”
Benefits of having three kids #3:
Being able to switch from man to zone defense at home.
Read 33 tweets

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