Thread by @ButchPrincessG

Now that I have MOSTLY calmed down from my anxiety fueled imposter syndrome attack of the last 24 hours, I will now babble thread about my HRT appointment.

There was very little waiting. Usually when I have a doc appt that LASTS HOURS it because 90% of it was waiting.

They got a more thorough medical history and understanding of my issues than any doc has done since I was a kid.

Not only did they (not being vague, it was two nurses and the "doc" NP, THREE PEOPLE) document my medical and mental health history, they stopped me and asked further questions and even made suggestions on future attempts for better diagnoses.

I must reiterate that this is a clinic headed by one NP, and they treat queer health issues only.

THE FIRST MEDICAL PROFESSIOALS IN YEARS to give a shit about my general health and they aren't even GP/Internists!!!

And they were super aware that their patients have most likely already been doing years of obsessive research on their own and discuss options with you as a peer.

Why can't chronic health issue doctors be like this!?

Moving on.
This was the easiest explaination of my defective meatcage I've ever had to do. Plus I didn't have to avoid any topics as one does with a new doc just in case.

e.g., sexuality, gender, THC.

And also, I've found that with so many chronic issues, that if I tell a new doc, specifically a GP, all of them at once, it's too much.

I have to pick the most critical, start from there, space it out over several appointments.

This was more like therapy. I was just able to freely INFO DUMP it.

And again, I'm left with a residual resentment at not being able to feel this heard and cared about by ANY DOC.

In fact, I only got partway the full history with second lady (who was the main person documenting it) and she stopped me and said. "But it's obvious your weight is a symptom, why is that being such a stumbling block to definite diagnoses?"

THANK YOU!!!
I want to kidnap the whole staff and take them with me to primary care and let them do the endless fight for me, and maybe bloody get somewhere!

ANYWAY!
Attempting to move thread past that bit.

It's a lot to unpack because it was a nearly 4 hour appointment. Even though I was being completely honest and felt safe there, I was operating on Charming Exterior Persona because the inside of my brain was in full panic meltdown.

Consequently it's a bit of a blur.

Separately, two of the three medical professionals, in different ways, had an in depth conversation with me about my transition goals being in the middle, not full MANLY MAN MAN.

The injection trainer/specialist's opinion [which she asked for my consent before giving it!!!] was "I've heard a lot of this not sure/worried over the years. But when it's at the point when you've been thinking about it for YEARS, it's past time to just go for it."

The Doc made sure I understood the standard progression and which changes are liable to be permanent if I decide to stop entirely, and then said "It sounds like you've done enough thinking & research that there's not much I could add. I'm good with okaying this."

The doc and I discussed different ways to go about this, and I shared what I'd learned in research. And unless he had objections/better suggestions, that I wanted to start with injections, find my goal, and then probably step down to patch/cream to maintain.

We discussed how this would work, changes wise, and he ultimately agreed that this seemed a reasonable course to take for me.

Then there was a mess of blood drawing, which my body decided to be a jerk about since I was mildly dehydrated from nerves because THAT'S HOW I DO.

Was given info on how to just pop in for injection training/further injection help, and made an appt for more labs in 3 months.

And now I have two of these tiny single dose vials, with two refills, and syringes.

And I'm going in tomorrow to get trained on jabbing and GET JABBED.

Wife is coming with me.

Which will make 31 May my T-day which is nice because my birthday is in a week-ish and I wanted my T-day to be in a different month to June, for birthday reasons and silly/irrational BUT THEY'RE MY FEELS, reasons.

unroll please