I'm feeling a bit stressed out lately and need to shine a light on an issue that maybe others in our shoes are feeling as well. In addition to the "normal stresses" of academia, those of us who are not citizens of the US have additional worries, especially now. /ramble thread
The truth is that we (my spouse and I) are extremely privileged. We live in a liberal bastion on the beautiful west coast. We both earn fairly high salaries (not as high as the Googlers but still), we both have shelter, food, and disposable income. We have financial security.
But at the same time, we're on temporary visas with expiration dates and contingencies, and one false move could mean being barred from entry to this country, where we have built our lives. I've spent countless hours researching visas instead of focusing on my research.
All of that research feels pointless now because whether we are allowed to enter the country or not really depends on the whims of the customs agent at the point of entry. They can deny us for any reason. This uncertainty is a constant worry.
Due to these worries I have denied myself the opportunity to go to some of the biggest conferences of my field, including #Exoplanets2 in the UK. There's no enjoyment of conferences in "far exotic locations" because I may have to abandon my life to experience them.
This extends to other parts of our lives as well. Recently we've been thinking of maybe buying a starter home so we don't have to pay the ridiculous Bay Area rent anymore, but that's a nonstarter in case I'm barred entry for some reason.
There are so many parts of life that non-citizens don't have access to, and I'm not just talking about DoD jobs.
Of course, as I said, we are privileged. Our worries are nothing compared to those in much more unfortunate and uncertain situations.
The most upsetting are those who are denied entry into the US based on their point of origin and, let's face it, their ethnicity and religion. By this point I think we've all seen empty poster boards at conferences with a slip of paper saying why those authors couldn't come.
And then there are those who are residents here, but who have nothing to go back to. My spouse and I are lucky here as well: we both have functioning homes and families in our countries of citizenship, but there are plenty of noncitizens in academia where this is their only life.
It's not just the time spent actually researching visas and immigration policies, it's also the emotional and psychological toll that constant uncertainty - and now fear - that takes us away from what we really want to do: Doing research and feeling the thrill of discovery.
So about that fear. I've been thinking of tweeting about all of this for a while, but I couldn't bring myself to do it because I fear what publicly declaring my feelings on this controversial subject would do to my status here. Will the customs agent deny me entry based on this?
But screw that. I need to vent this morning so here you go. I have a lot more thoughts all swirled about in my head but these are the somewhat coherent ones for now.
Just know that, if you're a citizen, things you take for granted like entering the US after a fun-filled trip overseas is actually pretty traumatic for the rest of us.
