"God laid you on my heart." = "I'm about to get all up in your business and invade your privacy." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"Love the sinner, hate the sin." = "I'm fine exploiting your time, money, and resources while simultaneously oppressing you because of who you are." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"You just need to read your Bible and pray more." = "It's your fault you're in the bad situation you're in and it's up to you to fix it." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"You need to submit more." = "Stop questioning those in authority, even when they're wrong." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"Biblical marriage" = "A straight man and a straight woman in a lifelong monogamous marriage where the husband is the head and the wife must submit. Can be easily threatened by things like talking to someone of the 'opposite' gender." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"Biblical manhood" = "Men are allowed to be abusive and harmful because they're the leaders. They have no self control and cannot be trusted around women because their hearts are full of lust. Never question them because God put them in charge." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"Biblical womanhood" = "Women are deceitful temptresses and cannot be trusted because Eve, therefore they must submit to man's authority and control. Their only purpose in life is to marry and have children; any deviation from that is sinful." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"Spare the rod, spoil the child." = "The Bible says it's okay for me to abuse my kids. How else will they learn to obey and behave?" #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"Honor your father and mother." = "I'm taking scripture out of context in order to shame you for not wanting to engage with your abusive parents." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"Biblical sexuality"/"Biblical gender" = "Everyone is supposed to be straight and cisgender. Your role in daily life is determined by the gender you were assigned at birth, which is immutable. Also everyone in the Bible was cishet." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"She tempted me" = "I treated her like a sex object, acted on it, and now I'm blaming her because I refuse to take responsibility for my actions." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"You have to take control of your thought life/take every thought captive" = "Repress your natural thoughts, feelings, and desires instead of sorting them out and dealing with them appropriately." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"Same-sex attraction" = "I view your sexuality as a problem that must be solved instead of an inherent part of your identity that should be affirmed." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"America needs to turn back to God" = "Everyone in the country needs to submit to our specific form of white evangelical cisheteropatriarchial Christianity." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"I love Israel! Pray for the peace of Jerusalem!" = "I'm an anti-Semite who is using a marginalized group of people to bring about the end of the world where they'll end up in hell." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"I'm speaking the truth in love" = "I'm a huge asshole who uses Jesus to excuse my shitty behavior." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"Liberals" = "People who are destroying the country by not letting me oppress people in the name of Jesus." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"Your identity is in Christ." = "Ignore your queerness. Just go ahead and repress your sexuality because it makes me feel icky." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"Women must be modest." = "Women make me uncomfortable and angry so I'm going to control them. If I hurt them, it's their fault for existing near me." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"It's still an open question for me" = "I'm being vague on purpose because my platform relies on the oppression of certain people and I don't want to be held accountable." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"God knows my heart." = "I know I'm a terrible person and I'm not going to change." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"Be not of this world." = "I don't care what happens to other people or the earth because Jesus is going to take me to heaven then destroy everything." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"Store up your treasures in heaven" = "I'm selfish and believe helping people here and now is a waste of time because I'm going to heaven." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"God works everything out for good." = "Stop complaining about the bad things that happened to you." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"You're/They're under God's judgement." = "It's your fault bad things are happening to you." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"Song of Solomon is a metaphor for Christ's love for the church." = "Sex is gross so we're just gonna repress all those naughty pants feels." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"That's what the Bible says!" = "I refuse to examine my privilege and internalized biases." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"I'm being persecuted for my faith!" = "Someone got mad at me for being an asshole!" #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
"Don't be unequally yoked." = "Don't marry someone we don't approve of, they might teach you scary things like autonomy and consent." #EvangelicalIntoEnglish
