Thread by @dianabutlerbass

It is worth noting that many commentators are saying that this whole wall-business and a "national emergency" is a way of Trump saving face.

"Saving face" is, of course, part of shame culture. People who feel shame, are mired in shame, or are afraid of shame, have to "save face."

Trump is often referred to as a narcissist. Narcissism is a defense -- maybe the major defense -- against shame.

Trump is putting us all through this because of his shame. That raises the question: Where does all that shame -- shame on a global scale -- come from? His family? His own sense of failure? His sins?

This is a helpful lay article on the subject: psychologytoday.com/us/blog/shame/…

And all it points toward some interesting theological questions. Supposedly, Christianity is a "sin-guilt" religion, not a "shame-honor" one.

Except -- as I've been exploring -- certain strains of American evangelicalism are shame-based.

And it is from that sub-culture that Trump finds his greatest support. I don't think Trump's relationship with them is purely transactional or political. I actually think they find some sort of theological kinship with each other.

There's very little work done on fundamentalism and shame, and even less on the relationship between fundamentalism, shame, and politics. But I think that Trump is a nearly perfect vehicle for this theological matrix.

I'm just thinking out loud here.

But I think it may be true.

And, if true, the worst thing others can do to a person or political movement mired in shame is to re-shame him (or them). Shaming the shamed feeds the cycle.

People can't heal from toxic shame unless they choose to.

And this puts us in a real mess. So many of us feel the only tactic is to call Trump out, point out why and how he's wrong, call him names, insult him, etc. THAT MAKES IT WORSE.

He goes deeper into his shame, but can't admit it. So, he externalizes more. Goes further into the delusion of his own perfection, manifested in narcissism and blame and anger. We see it everyday on Twitter. We'll see it tonight.

And the desperation to restore his own honor, to prove his moral rectitude, to exercise power over those he thinks are to blame for his shame becomes more insistent.

I'm a historian and theologian -- I can see these things -- but I have no idea how to get beyond them. Except it is clear that this cycle needs to break and it can only break by intervention, honesty, clarity, and (I think), spiritually through things like grace and mercy.

From one psychologist: "If you directly confront a malignant narcissist, you’ll never succeed in puncturing their ironclad defenses. Plus, they’re notorious for counter-punching really, really hard. Whenever they feel attacked, they can be set aflame."

Ah, yes. We sure are seeing that.

But what happens when this person is doing this to a nation?

Is each one of called to stand up? Not to insult or shame, but to be adults, holding onto our personhood, self-respect, integrity, dignity. Not to give into the conflicts and lies manufactured from the stuff of shame?

The therapeutic literature says that victims of narcissists have to save themselves. But how does a nation save itself?