Thread by @shockproofbeats

It's THREE YEARS since I tricked Selfridges into printing loads of words that mean shite on Nutella jars and MORE IMPORTANTLY the Daily Mail wrote a whole bullet point scandal hit piece about my crime. Still delighted with the pic they used in fairness.

I mean all of these sour, sober bullet points are incredible but I've always thought the breathless manner in which they reveal I don't even like Nutella is particularly italian_chef.jpg

I, "cheeky prankster" that I am, got six printed over the course of about three weeks. I'd had Backdirt, Arsemuck and Bumgravy printed by the time this article came out. Gutbroth, Scat and Turrdz were to come. Oh sweet flower of youth

What's funnier is I never gave an interview to the Mail. These were remarks I gave to Trinity Mirror group that some poor sod must have had to repackage. It is true that Selfridges were super suspicious of me by the end tho. They followed me round the store once or twice.

My absolute favourite bit is the official response they got from the makers of Nutella, about me having branded their jars of brown paste with poo slang. You may recognise as my Twitter header.

"IT IS DISAPPOINTING".

So obviously the comments under this article - about me spending a couple of lunchtimes getting some words that mean shite printed on jars of brown paste - would take the whole affair with the good humour in which it was intended.

The Derry part was also a big stickler for some readers who, I have to presume, were on board with the pooey Nutella jars themselves, but had super strong feelings about local geographical nomenclature.

hehehe I bet you thought hehehe that I love Nutella but hehehe I don't even like it hehehe #prank #£19

For the record, these are the six Nutella jars on which I printed slang terms for shite. Wow. My works. My babies. I reckon they could work beautifully as a calendar if you put two months on each page. Publishers, hit me up.