Thread by @HoarseWisperer

A couple days ago, my son and I were bickering. The normal parent-child friction of one or both being less than at their best.

We have our moments. We’re both strong-willed and get heated. Shrinking violets, we are not.

So ours is not a relationship without arguments.

1/

We always do our ‘housekeeping’ though. We talk about what happened; come to understand where the other was coming from; and each own our mistakes.

He annoys me sometimes. I annoy him sometimes. Rules get broken. Battles ensue.

There is no perfection in the Hoarse household.
2/

I’ve always told him our relationship is like a mountain.

Sometimes storms sweep in; the wind and snow howl; and we may not be able to see the mountain... but it’s always there.

Nothing moves the mountain.

3/

So, we had a bit of a storm a couple days ago.

We’ve been having them lately. He’s climbing toward the cruising altitude of his preteen years. Turbulence will occur inflight.

But then there are days like today.

4/

I am supposed to attend an event in a couple weeks. Notable speakers and attendees. I was happy to be invited and happy to be going.

Yesterday though, because, of course...

...I found out my son’s big drumline performance, his last of the year, falls on the same day.

5/

I can’t do both. The event would require travel. Can’t be in both places. It’s one or the other.

So, today, on the way home from school, I talked to my son about it.

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Me: So, you remember (Event) I was telling you about?

Him: Yeah. Cool you’re going to see—

Me: Know what day it is?

Him: No.

Me: The same day as your performance.

Him: (without a second’s thought) You should go to your event! It’s okay, dad.

7/

Him: You’ve seen me play before. You can do something for you.

Me: (choked up a bit) Thank you. I appreciate that more than you know.

Him: 🙂

Me: I’ve already thought about it...

Him: ...

Me: ...I’m going to go to the one that’s more important to me

8/

Him: (Whole-face smile) You can see my solo...

Me: Wouldn’t miss it.

Him: You can go, you know.

Me: I know. I’m bummed they’re the same day. Not a hard choice though.

Him: 😊

Me: 😊

—————

9/

There was a storm on the mountain a couple days ago. There will be more. They’ll blow in and blow out.

Nothing moves the mountain though.

And even though I look up at it every single day, sometimes the sun catches it just right and I’m humbled by the view.

10/10