Thread by @hiHelloHans

Every time I meet a new intersex person, I hear at LEAST 1 of

1⃣It's my first time meeting someone
2⃣They told me I never would
3⃣I didn't know if I was "intersex enough"
4⃣I was out as gay/trans for much longer
5⃣I only knew I had a 'medical thing'

obvs no coincidence #thread

1⃣ This is all political. Keeping people medicalized, small in numbers, and in the dark about finding others slows social change.

2⃣ Intersex is still viewed as medically 'fixable' in ways that are horrifying when understood in an LGBT context: once they have operated/blasted with hormones that person is now 'normal' and 'cured.'

3⃣ Who 'counts' as intersex is political. In 2019, urology groups spent significant lobbying $ to brand the most 'fixable' and common cases (that line more closely up to usual 2 paths of sex development) as 'not intersex.'

This also divides those who take on the word intersex, from those who might prefer to remain 'people with medical conditions,' which is safer.

The latter is of course valid! People should do what feels safe+right for them! But imo the divide is by design.

A lot of people I meet say they weren't sure if they could use the word intersex for themselves, even though they sensed their own experiences with unwanted medical attention/puberty/their own body fit the bill. This relates.

4⃣ Thanks largely to media work, we're getting to some common public understanding of what it means to be gay, and even what it means to be a (probably binary) trans person. Intersex is nowhere near close to that.

So of course people are more hesitant to come out as intersex. I was. Have been out for ~5 yrs, but knew for 13. Waited explicitly because I was concerned the public didn't know enough about it.

I still know plenty of people who are out as gay/trans but closeted as intersex.

Because it's so unknown, intersex is still at the stage where coming out conversations easily devolve into expectations of sharing personal medical trauma/anatomical details. So I get it... not very appealing.

5⃣ SO many new intersex people I've met tell me they knew they had a 'medical thing' for YEARS but had an aha moment when they finally heard the word intersex randomly on the internet.

This was the case for me too. I just got lucky and had early role models. thx @Pidgejen

I get shit sometimes from folks in the 'you need a formal medical diagnosis to claim the word intersex' camp.

Again: NOT saying it's something anyone can simply decide they are, or that history of appropriation (in order to retroactively validate being queer/trans) is okay.

But formal medical language and 💸tests & appointments💸 to confirm lived experience are NOT available to every intersex person.

These are significant class barriers, and factors that keep us isolated, medicalized. I say this as a person who did have those things.

SO, more reminders that it's critical to bust stigma, and be a help to those who are new to their own intersex process. 💛✨

It takes this kind of care and attention to help more people feel confident enough to be out, if or when it's right for them.

Feeling so much love for all the newly out intersex people I've met recently, and a fire to keep working so there can be even more soon. 🔥

Twitter threading is wonky today but.. I think this worked and is all one proper piece? Lots of thoughts. u_u;;