Hello! This might get long and emotional but bear with me... It’s difficult to explain what it means to be on the #CKG18 Longlist, not for me but for where I come from and what it represents. Difficult but hopefully not impossible. Let me explain 👇🏽👇🏽👇🏽
I have always written and I will always write. Since I was published, the reasons why I write have changed. When I was first published I visited a school in Ilford, East London. My first ever Author school visit. I did a short talk, signed some books, took some pics. I felt good.
Confused, I replied, let me in where? “You’re published. They only let one in at a time right? It’s your turn. For now.” I was shocked. I said something like, no it’s not like that, I just wrote it and it happened etc but I could see he wasn’t convinced and he left.
I think of that Bangladeshi boy often. He was already cynical. And resolute about what he felt was true. Although it didn’t work exactly like that, I couldn’t argue there wasn’t some truth to what he said. It made me determined to push for more BAME writers to be published.
Similarly, I was invited to do some workshops in a girls school off Brick Lane. They were top set in everything. So smart and razor sharp. I set them the task of creating a character and asked them to start with a name. After a few mins, I asked what they had come up with...
“Sarah, Kate, Linda, Eve, Jane,” were the names they picked. I looked at the register in front of me. There was Ammara, Faiza, Zahra, Zainub, Aisha.” I said, hold up, stop there. These are all English names. Did no one want to use a name like your own? Or you Mum? Or Aunty?
All the girls looked at me like I was mad. “Who wants to read them stories, Sir?” Nobody wants to read stories about us.” I was a young writer and by no means naive, but this still shocked me and more than that broke my heart. They just couldn’t see themselves in books.
It’s why I worked with @FirstStory because similarly they had started putting writers in residence in schools for this exact reason. I made the girls change the characters names. They argued and complained but at the end, not only the names had changed but so had the stories.
The girls had put themselves in the stories and the characters had come alive. Those are just two examples, I have twenty more. If you look in a mirror and can’t see yourself - do you exist? That boy and these girls think the system is rigged and that nobody wants their stories.
Sad thing is, both have been true. The great thing is there are now many more writers, librarians, activists, publishers, editors, journalists, teachers, mums and dads who want to see equality in opportunities in publishing and wider representation in books.
I write for that boy and those girls. So that they see a name they recognise on the cover, characters that look and act like their own family, language they use at home, cultural references that have deeper meaning and most importantly of all, a story they can call their own.
I don’t usually get that emotional on twitter! If you’ve got this far, I appreciate you reading and for putting up with me! Thank-you 🙏🏽
On the periphery stood a boy, loitering. I beckoned him over and asked if he wanted me to sign his book. He could have been me 15 years previously. He sized me up and asked, “Why’d they let you in then?”
