Thread by @KaiaSonderby

Back to the salt mines known as AUTISM UNCENSORED. All trigger warnings still apply.

Chapter four is called Thoroughly Vetted and starts with some lyrics from a REM song because this woman is so goddamn pretentious. #HellMother

"I mourn my former physical autonomy but can't possibly share my irrational fears with anyone else because I know how selfish it sounds."

Then why are you having this kid!? #HellMother hates this so intensely, I just can't understand why she went through with it.

It's okay not to want children!

#HellMother is making this very big deal out of how "good" she's being, eating tofu and brown rice and doing what she thinks is best for the baby. There's a sensation of "I did everything right, so why isn't my child normal!?" that I just can't shake.

"Just as natural as his offhand observation, upon sizing up the filthy stack in my kitchen sink, that I seemed to be a slob."

Uh, if a dude said that to me on the first date, I'd kick his out out the door, but apparently #HellMother felt this was a sign that Keith was perfect

for her.

I don't know if I'd say #HellMother has any kind of neurodivergence herself, but she absolutely has Issues.

"My vision of marriage was a protective shield from the vagaries of life, to which I had never become accustomed, badly wishing for a true ally."

None of this stuff about #HellMother and Keith has anything to do with autism. The reason I'm bringing it up is that it feels like

#HellMother has always been ill-suited to relationships. She has major control issues, needs everything to be just so, and had some pretty messed up ideas about how people act in relationships.

I married my husband for love, not because I thought he could shield me from things.

Good lord. #HellMother didn't even stop to consider things like disability before having this child. That she could be faced with a child who could be born with any manner of things included ones that are quickly fatal.

Always, always, ALWAYS consider ahead of time whether you

are willing and capable of dealing with this possibility. If you have even the smallest doubt that you could handle a disabled child DO NOT HAVE CHILDREN. Period.

#HellMother

"And if there's one unequivocal truth, it's that I cannot handle the pain and lifelong commitment of a seriously disabled child. I;m not made of that mettle; I don't have the innate goodness, selflessness, and perseverance that others seems to naturally have." #HellMother

The way she contrasts having a disabled child vs a non-disabled child here is very telling.

A disabled child is a "terrifying possibility...severely compromised." Non-disabled children are "ushering in a glorious and sturdy newborn." #HellMother