Discover and read the best of Twitter Threads about #Storytime

Most recents (24)

Hace tiempo que no comparto un momento #storytime y me ha venido a la mente cuando fracasé terriblemente y perdí muchísimo dinero apuntándome a clases de coreano en Yonsei durante un verano. ¿Os cuento?
La cosa es que un verano cuando estaba viviendo en Corea decidí que ya que tenía el visado y el alquiler tenía que pagarlo igual, en vez de irme a España en verano me quedaría haciendo un intensivo de coreano para mejorar.
Tenía pensada otras universidades a decir verdad, pero después de hablar con amigos me dijeron que Yonsei era la más a tope y la que metía más caña con el coreano escrito y más académico, y más gramática, que era lo que yo quería porque con el coreano hablado me defendía.
Read 53 tweets
There is a story the bees used to tell, which makes it hard to disbelieve. #Storytime
A flock of sheep who had left their farm had chosen a wolf as their leader. #Storytime
Two years later, some of the sheep were starting to regret their choice, as the lead wolf brought in more and more of his friends, all of them hungry and not at all averse to the odd haunch of mutton. #Storytime
Read 16 tweets
THE TIME I FUCKED MY BROTHERS BESTFREIND💦🍆! #storytime #storythreads #threads #freakythreads
So let’s start off with this being my first story time so might be a little yunno😬! Anyways brother bestfreind = LJ
Ok so me and my brother was over my auntie house we stayed for a weekend because my mom and dad went for a lil trip or w.e🤷🏽‍♀️
Read 29 tweets
𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄 𝐈 𝐌𝐘 𝐁𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐒 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐒𝐈𝐍 𝐆𝐀𝐕𝐄 𝐌𝐄 𝐆𝐎𝐎𝐃 𝐀𝐒𝐒 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃😼👅💦🙈~(VERY DETAILED😏)
#storytimethreads #threadstorytime #thread #storytime #dirtythreads #stories #storyboard #FreakyStoryTime #Freak
So basically my bestfriend we gon call her L 😭so yea🥵 so me and L was bored and ig her uncle was throwing some big party 🤭and L asked me if i wanted to go so at first i was like no cause her fine ass cousin was gon be there 🙈 and when i tell you he was fine that nigga was cut
So lemme describes him real quick he 6’0 👀 Puerto Rican/Black 🥵curly hair and plays basketball 🤤 and we gon call him Q so Q fine as hell so i was scared 💀 cause i always liked him but mama ain’t raise no bitch so i was like aight bet L I’ll go with you so i asked her what tim
Read 15 tweets
It’s #Monday, I’m boozing it up at a 4 seat bar, the #barkeep is a long pourer, and I’m all fucking set if I get something stuck between my teeth.👇🙃 #RandomThoughts #drinking #OutAndAbout
Shooting the shit with a friend, she’s proud to be doing well with her plants - unusual for her.

The key was a #video explaining the benefits of pruning.

She needs REASONS. She got them.

Apparently, pruning in a particular manner stimulates growth hormones.
#RandomThoughts
Of course, this led to me initiating a discussion about the #movie I just watched on Hulu, called “The German Doctor.”

The main character was Josef Mengele. #ThisHappened

People, this is why I’m known in my circles as “The Black Hole Of Conversation.” SMTH
#RandomThoughts
Read 239 tweets
#storytime #threads #storytimethreads the time I got this 🐱 💦👅 ATE !!
Yo slimessss 💚💚👉🏾. Sooo I see majority of y’all chose first time getting my cootie cat ate so let’s get into it shall we ?
So the nigga that did this is my ex best friend from previous threads. His name is Lenny. Ima re- describe him to y’all Incase y’all don’t remember. Soooo he’s tall 6ft. a milk chocolate 🍫🍫🥵color. he got dimples 😩 a lot of curly hair and a BIG ASS DICK!! His shit is 8in👅
Read 33 tweets
I’ll tell that other story time later THIS one is more better and friskier 😈😈🤫.....#Threads #storytimethreads #storytimes #STORYTIME: Fingered in tha mfin Uber 🤣
So me and my nigga Quay🤪 (Yes from the Otha storytime) was finna go on a luh double date or whateva so..yk I had to luck cute for my nigga..with his fine ass💗 I had on dick appointment pants and this cute ass shirt I looked like a mfin.... 🥴
So we playin around on the way..touchin each other and yk that cute shit☺️he kept lookin at me knowin damn WELL he still make me AND my pussy nervous af😩 so I had a plan for daddyyyy🤪
Read 10 tweets
Story time A THREAD: THE TIME MY BF AND I GOT SUPER FREAKY💦💦#Threads #threadstorytime #freak #storytime #stories
This the boy from my last story’s😭 so he Carmel wit waves☺️ but he not the cutest in the bunch🤷🏽‍♀️ be he taller than me ANYWAYS TJ and I had broken up for a few months and he got another gf🙄 so they broke up and I was like
So he texting me on snap telling me why they broke up and that he should have never broke up with me😂 so we talkin for like a two months now and so he asked me out🤪 I said yes then we texting freaking🙂 mind you we live in the same neighborhood so😋 but we outside and we sneak
Read 9 tweets
The 24 hour (alternate reality) of a court hearing. 

Tomorrow I'll wake up and step into the bubble of adrenalin that will carry me through court date #52. 

First a quick scan of my phone to confirm all is going ahead as scheduled. 
#storytime
#bringleiferback
#Israel
During the day, discussions with NIcole & Elly to arrange what time they will arrive at mine, to be together like we are every court date. 
(I've got the best couch in the family) 
Israel wakes and the calls from reporters will begin at 3pm. 
#bringleiferback
#storytime
#israel
I'll confirm with those who contact us - we are not in Israel now, we hope to be soon, we're available over Skype for interviews. 

I'll try to ignore my phone btw 4 - 5pm & spend time with my daughter before worry & adrenalin fully kick in.
#bringleiferback
#storytime
#israel
Read 16 tweets
I feel like making you all laugh today so here is a #storytime of the first and only time I had surgery, two years ago. Yeah it’s about surgery but I PROMISE you’re gonna laugh bc this was truly a series of unfortunate events.
First, time for a little bit of backstory. I am a cheerleader. I base. Which means I literally lift humans up in the air. This makes me very prone to injury obviously and I have countless videos of me getting hit in the face by someone’s feet. But that one time was different.
It was a regular Friday night practice and things were going well. I had my flyer’s foot in my hands and we were about to do a tick tock which means she was supposed to switch legs.
I bent my fingers a tiny bit and she landed straight on my finger, forcing it bent unnaturally.
Read 43 tweets
sooo me and my boyfriend, we’re gonna call him Kai bc I don’t expose names🧚🏽‍♀️so backstory, Kai and I had been dating for almost 6 months, i’m his first girlfriend and he always been all bout school and nothing else not freaky but i turned this boy into a freak.
before we dated we were bsf so at this point we trust each other bare and we’re Freaky asf, all our friends think we’re crazy ass ppl for the shit we do ANYWAYS.
Read 20 tweets
So like this was in summer 18' and during this summer I usually spend my time at my gurls crib, ( and both our parents were cool wit us dating) so one day my gurl told me to "cum ova🍆🍑" so I deadass hopped on my bike and rode my ass there in the blazing sun.
So I had reached the tight as hell cause the sun was fucking on one that day. Tell me why, the moment I reached there, my gurl tells me she not home yet💀💀
Read 12 tweets
Cette photo date de 1901. Personne n'y a cru en la voyant. Qui aurait posé comme ça en 1900 ? QUI ?

Sauf qu’elle est authentique.

#storytime ⬇️
Il faut dire que sur toutes les représentations des photos que nous avons de l’époque, le sourire est effectivement plutôt rare. Et il y a plusieurs explications à ça Michel.
Certains avancent l’argument de l’hygiène dentaire.
Bon c'est vrai qu'à l'époque, on avait plutôt tendance à avoir les chicots de Jacquouille et l’haleine pas très Ricola. Du coup, on se gardait bien de faire risette à l’objectif.
Read 13 tweets
Did my children greet me w Good Morning today?

Oh, no, their first words to me was a demand that I settle their argument.

The heated debate?

11yo daughtr: MOMMA! Would you tell him that if a woman gets sperm from a sperm bank, the man that gave the sperm is NOT the father?!!?!
Y'all.

All I was doing was trying to pee.

The 9yo son: *EYE* SAY he is the father! Of course there isn't love and he doesn't know the baby, but he gave the sperm, HIS sperm was used to make that life, so he IS THE FATHER!

11yo daughtr: BUT THAT'S NOT THE POINT OF A SPERM BANK!
The 11yo follows this up with, "WHAT??!? HAVE YOU READ THAT IN A JOURNAL SOMEWHERE?!"

Sis said,
CITE👏🏾YOUR👏🏾SOURCES👏🏾!

(Low key, if you follow me u already know my nerd spirit rose like the phoenix in that moment;couldn't be more proud. LOL #ChipOffTheBrilliantBlock😭)
Read 9 tweets
STORYTIME!!: how I lost my virginity and regretted it. 🙄 #StoryTime #Thread #threadstorytime #threadstorytimes #threadstories #storytelling
Soooo I lost my virginity to my off&on ex G (refer to my other storytime.) this was in August & it happened multiple times.. the first was August 10th.🙄 first of all I was scared & i was mad because i went straight to his damn house after they stank ass football practice.
So we went to his house we was kissin or whatever in his room while his brother was in the front & he started fingering me & sucking my titties & shit. After awhile he was like are you ready im like hell nah, i was hella scared and not ready.
Read 7 tweets
Some days, I’m amazed by my own charm and grace.

Thursday was not one of those days.

#storytime
First of all, I was so distracted thinking about the sandwich I was about to go pick up that I literally walked into the wall while passing by the CEO’s office. Like, BAM.

She looked up. #ofcourse
I smiled awkwardly and then ran out the door. In the lobby, the security guy said, “Hope you brought your umbrella.” ☔️

Thinking he was quipping about the overcast weather - geez dude, it’s only sprinkling - the sandwich shop’s across the street, I chuckle and head out
Read 13 tweets
(1) The story of #RubyRidge is nothing but heartbreaking.

Let's take a moment to discuss a story the Federal Government would rather be forgotten. A story of a family that only wanted to worship their God, raise their children, and be left alone.
(2) #StoryTime. Ruby Ridge is an outstretch of mountains in the northernmost part of Idaho, in a county named Boundary, as it rests right along the Canadian border, between the Washington and Montana borders.

When someone wants to be left alone, Ruby Ridge is one place they go.
(3) One person who wished nothing more than to be left alone was Randy Weaver. Weaver was a devout Christian & US Army vet who had become disillusioned with his government; in the early 1980's, he moved his family to a 20-acre plot of land on Ruby Ridge and built himself a home.
Read 27 tweets
Hola, insomnes. Os voy a contar un cuento (porque las historias tienen poder, y porque quiero) #Cuento #loscuentosdemamadulce #StoryTime #elcuentodelamonagorda
Esto era un rey que tenía tres hijos. Era ya muy viejo y no sabía a cual de los tres dejar su corona, así que decidió ponerlos a prueba y los envió en busca de la bacía más maravillosa del mundo. El que la consiguiera, sería el rey.
#Cuento #elcuentodelamonagorda
Por si os lo preguntáis, una bacía es una palangana para afeitar, como la que Don Quijote usaba de casco. O eso me dijo mi abuela.
#Cuento #elcuentodelamonagorda
Read 47 tweets
#storytime: [Thread] The dark sides of “social” enterprises - #Ableism in disguise

The other day, I was referred to the owner a social enterprise in order to apply job in my profession. The org seemed impressed by my portfolio and I eventually got invited to a job interview.
It all sounded promising and I was excited to meet with the company. Everything went well until they asked about my expectations. I was a bit surprised, since I was already in the job interview, but I highlighted that I’m looking for employment or at least continuous remote work.
Much to my shock, the only thing this organization had to offer was a “sheltered workshop”, where I would be working for free and maybe one day, some employer might hire me on a subsidized job, where I can only be paid minimum wage.
Read 12 tweets
STORYTIME MY EX BOYFRIEND TIRED TO GET HIS MOM TO DRAG ME !
So me and my ex boyfriend had very bad problems. I’d argue over who ate the last Dount, yes stuff like that 😩🤦🏽‍♂️ so one day he text me talking bout “i don’t wanna be in the relationship anymore” i’m okay i’ve been thinking that for the longest. We aruging. Then i get a
text from his mom. He like “Why you break up with my son???” i’m so confused i’m like your son broke up with me sister 😂 so i’m over her. I text him back with a long paragraph, longer than an essay. So he reply with a “🖕🏽👊🏾” i’m like he want to fight me 😂?
so next morning
Read 9 tweets
STORYTIME MY MOM WAS PROSTITUTING ME FOR RENT MONEY
I was 16 years old and my mom was acting suspicious because she normally don’t leave the house as late as she was 2 months ago. So i’m coming home from school i see my mom sleep on the couch and she don’t get off until 5:30 and it was 3:50 that’s why i was confused.
later that night i was getting out the shower and i guess my mom “Friend” was walking by and i bumped into him and my towel spilt so my legs was out and he started liking his lips and i pushed passed him to go to my room.
It was like 7 men coming in and out the house. That
Read 13 tweets
There were five
of us in that
elevator
that dropped
It was
an everyday day
good weather
high hopes
busy
ambitious
impatient
unintelligible
We all ended our day
at the same time
which was why
five strangers
were in
that elevator
that #Monday
.
#storytime
#threads
#amwriting
The doors closed
that #Monday
but nothing happened
He jammed the close button
The other grumbled,
some version
"Always when
your trying to
get home"
The doors
opened
closed
the elevator jumped
we froze
a collective intake
waiting
then we fell
.
#storytime
#threads
#amwriting
we braced ourselves
and each other
one screamed
another managed
to hit the alarm
but it keep going
alarm screaming
us screaming
twenty stories
an impossibly
fast drop in
slow motion
three of us
on the floor
clutching
the handrail
then it was
black
#storytime
#threads
#amwriting
Read 5 tweets
Two wildest times I’ve had sex 🤦🏾‍♂️😂😂 #storytime #threads
I’ll start with the more recent one. So this was this past weekend and Me and my girlfriend Jasmine were going out to eat for my birthday so I get ready and drive to her and when I get there her sister answer the door
So I was like “wassup Jessie is your sister ready yet” and she’s like “child you know she be taking the longest showers ever” so I go in the house and sit on the couch for a while then her sister left and Jasmine was still in the shower 🙄 BUT
Read 19 tweets
Good series/movies on Netflix: A thread
#Thread #Threads #Threadstorys #Netflix #Storytime #Twitterthread
WHAT HAPPENED TO MONDAY: (movie)
7 sisters that are seputplets live in a future that has the one-child policy due to overpopulation, and they all adapt the same identity. When one of their sisters go missing, they search for her whilst avoiding being detected by the government.
7 seconds: (a series- currently has 1 season with 10 episodes)
After a 15 year old black boy is the victim of a hit and run by a white police officer, the police department try to cover up the crime committed by one of their own officers.
Read 10 tweets

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