In the midst of all kinds of bad, however much bad, there always is a silver lining. You see while I was creating confusion and chaos in my mind from fighting and suppressing the anxiety, insecurity and low self-esteem I felt, it would last only a moment.
A long moment though, when you consider constant bickering in your mind's mind every second of every minute of every day for almost two years. But my persistence in insisting that all is well and I was getting better, even when I didn't feel better, facilitated my mind's healing.
Like they say,practice makes perfect.If you practice something over and over and you never stop, no matter what, one day you will get it.This is applicable to all things in life.The only way you won't master through practice is when you stop or if you die before you perfected it.
My mind started to grow used to me replacing bad thoughts with good ones, saying kind words to myself regardless of the situation, reminding myself to stay in the present moment and mind only my business.
I started self help.Meditation, inspirational and motivation talks and music, I quit social media and TV for a few weeks too. However, gratitude is my go to quick pill. Once I start feeling out of place, I immediately start appreciating everything and everyone that comes to mind
"Every moment is precious and beautiful filled with Love, Joy. Peace. Tranquility. Serenity." - Debasish Mridha
The fight in my mind triggered a determination in me to make sure the positive side of me wins because I love positive me, she's the bomb! That fake positivity that I was practicing has gradually become a part of me and I love every bit of it.
I'm falling deeper in love with myself as I meditate and speak affirmations every morning and it's causing me, without any effort, to love everything and everyone around me. There's a peace within me that comes from knowing that I'm now in control.
I have come to understand that the reason I went through that turmoil was because the person I used to be: Church girl, Socialite, Honors Student; obviously no longer served me. I was confused about religion, had become introverted and a dropout.
If I would ever enjoy life as God has destined for me, I'd need a new identity. Like an African Spiny Mouse, I'd need to regrow my lost skin, my lost foundation.
Check the full story here: iletmelive.com/2018/12/25/the…
