decided to try crusader kings again and this is what the randomizer gave me. i didn't do it on purpose. it didn't say, "make me pervert michael cera" 
i didn't give pervert michael cera that santa hat either
i've made his coat of arms a horrible deer/doorknocker monstrosity
his name is Ingomer Gunberts. the random name generator in this one is fabulous
he is a paranoid, lustful cannibal who is also ugly, possessed and an "impaler"
people HATE him
he has married a princess
he has been appointed "keeper of the swans" so watch the FUCK out, SWANS
lol
oh my vassals are also revolting
RIP
okay let's try this again
i made a lady this time and no one will matrilineal marry her??
update: i found the checkbox
meet my husband, Karl Karling
good news everyone i'm blackmailing my vassal
yes dear i appointed you to that myself
